Missing, But Never Gone
by 0ShatteredPenance0
Summary: AU! Zach and Cammie have known each other since childhood. They were happily married until she disappears. Seven years later, and Zach still hasn't given up hope.
1. Chapter 1

**Hey All! I'm baaaaaaaack! :) OHOHOOHO, sorry I had a moment there.**

**Anyways, this is my newest story, normally I would give a summary or something but I don't want to give anything away. Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I DO NOT own Gallagher Girls, and I would like to give credit to CaraNo for inspiration from her story (not a Gallagher Girl fanfic) to give me the idea for writing a story to see Zach's not-so-perfect-side. **

**And here's Chapter 1 for Missing, But Never Gone!**

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><p><strong>Chapter One<strong>

**~Zachary Goode~**

_I was thinking about you again._

I let the hot water cascade down my bare back. My knees felt weak. I felt weak. I placed both hands against the tiled wall to keep myself upright.

_Your beautiful face is permanently embedded into every thought, every memory I have. _

I felt some of the tension in my shoulders subside but it wasn't enough. It never was enough.

All I could see was her smile, her soft lips, her enticing blue eyes. That's when it hit me in waves.

_Pain. Pain. Pain._

That's all I ever felt anymore. I couldn't be happy even if I tried. The anger and pain would never leave. The tension and anxiety never decreased.

_They haven't for the past seven years._

But what could I do? She was gone.

I had nothing to live for anymore.

_But that's not true._

There was Macey.

_I had to live for Macey. I would fake a smile for her. I would hold her in my arms and promise things I knew I couldn't. _

But I lived for her smile, I lived to hear her laugh. Her joy.

_But it only reminds me of you, Cookie. Only you. _

I smiled slightly at the thought of her nickname. She giggled every time I said it even though she's been my Cookie for years.

_Pain. Pain. Pain._

Suddenly I heard a scream.

I raced out of the shower, throwing my clothes on as fast as I could. Her screams only got louder.

I rushed out of the bathroom that was connected to the Master Bedroom where she was sweating in tears. Screaming and screaming.

_Please make the pain go away, Cookie._

"Macey...Shh, you were having a nightmare," I wrapped my arms around her small frame, trying to comfort her in so many ways. The nightmares happened often. Too often and it killed another part of me every time.

She finally stopped screaming, opening her burning, watery eyes to look up at me. "I-I'm sorry."

I smoothed down her hair. "It's okay, baby. I've got you."

_Pain. Pain. Pain._

"I'm _sorry," _she sobbed into my chest. It was almost as if she were trying to convince herself that I was real. That I was there. That she was here. She was real.

"I know, Macey. I love you, sweetie. Go back to sleep."

She nodded against my chest. "O-okay..." she said softly.

I pulled the covers over us, rubbing her back soothingly. I didn't care that my hair was still wet and that it was 42 degrees outside in the middle of a Boston winter. She was all that mattered in my life now.

"Goodnight, Mace," I whispered once I felt her relax into my arms and drift off again.

"Goodnight, Daddy."

* * *

><p><em>"Hi Zach!" she waved at me while carrying her lunchbox. <em>

_I waved at her, "Hiya Cammie! was'ya gots in your lunch box?" _

_She flinched back and held the Disney Princess lunchbox to her chest. "NUFFING! You can't look!" she huffed. _

_I raised an eyebrow at my best friend, "Real-wy? Well I'm gonna tell Miss Jenna you not sharin'!" I threatened with an evil grin._

_"No! Alwight, Zach, you can wook inside. Just don't take meh cookies! I love meh cookies," she cautioned._

_I knew she loves cookies. She has them everyday. She says she bakes with her mommy and daddy everyday just so's she can has cookies for lunch the next day._

_An idea formed in my mind._

_"Alwight, Cammie. I pwomise," I grinned before unzipping the lunchbox and peering in to look at the freshly baked chocolate chip cookies. "Mmmm."_

_Cammie's eyes widened in fear as I took one. "Hey! Zach, gimme dat back!" _

_My grin widened as I held it up. I was two inches taller than her. Thas' what Miss Jenna say._

_"You're going to have to catch me first!" I taunted and started to run from our table outside and onto the play field. _

_Cammie was fast. _

_"Gimme my cookie!" she yelled and tackled me to the ground. _

_I hit the grass with an 'oomph' as I stuffed the cookie into my mouth so she wouldn't geddit. _

_"Zach! NO!" She yelled and I saw tears form in her eyes as she hovered over me. _

_"Thanks for the cookie, Cammie! Your my newest Bestest Fwend!" I mumbled with the cookie in my mouth. _

_"Real-wy?" she asked with her wide, blue eyes, completely forgetting about the stolen goods. _

_"Yeah!" I said and nodded to her. _

_But she started giggling and fell to the grass beside me. "You has cookie crumbs all over your mouths!" she pointed at me and giggled. _

_I wiped my mouth in embarrassment but started to laugh with her. "You has cookie on your mouth too!" I pointed out._

_She licked her lips with an 'mmm' and smiled. She was missing two of her teeth. _

_"You're a cookie!" I laughed and her eyes widened. _

_"I am?" her mouth made an 'o'. _

_"Yep! Les' go pway over-" I started to say but was interrupted my Miss Jenna. I don't like Miss Jenna very much.  
><em>

_"All first graders, let's go back inside!" Miss Jenna called us from our lunch recess."We're going have arts and crafts!" _

_I like Miss Jenna lots._

_But not as much as Cammie. She doesn't have cooties like other girls.  
><em>

_"C'mon Cookie Cammie!" I grabbed her hand as we ran down the play field and back to the classroom. _

_"Can you sit wif me on the rug Zach?" Cammie asked with her big blue eyes wide._

_"Your my bestest fwend, Cammie. Is' the law!"_

_She squealed happily and we sat down to finish learning how to draw our ABC's._

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><p><em>Pain. Pain. Pain. <em>

I woke up from the dream, or rather the memory. I looked over at the clock on the bedside table. 3 AM. I looked down to see Macey still sleeping beside me. Her dirty blond hair splayed across the pillow. Her freckled nose let out a whistling sound every time she exhaled.

_She looks just like you, baby. She's all you. She has my eyes but everything else is you._

_Pain. Pain. Pain._

My chest hurt. Well...everything hurt.

I got up and walked out to the balcony. My hands fisted in my dark brown hair. I tried to get her out of my head. It's been seven fucking years since it happened. Everything reminds me of her. The pain grows in my chest. Growing, burning, killing me everyday.

Another set of fresh tears spilled down my cheeks. My friends have told me to move on. Her cousin, Macey, who we named our little Macey after, told me not to give up. And I listened.

_I'll never give up on you, Cookie. Never._

But everyone else says to let go. That it wasn't healthy for me or Little Macey.

_Pain. Pain. Pain._

It's only been her. It will only be her until I die. Not even in death would I stop loving Cameron Goode.

_I love you Cookie, please come back. Prove to them. You're not gone from this world. I can still feel you. I know it's you. _

_God, I love you Cammie. _

"Daddy? Mommy? Daddy! NO!" I heard Macey scream from inside the room.

I rushed over holding her in my arms until she calmed down from her dream.

_I need you, baby. Please. I don't know what to do anymore.  
><em>

_Pain. Pain. Pain._

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><p><strong>So, that was the first chapter! Okay, it was more of a prologue but whatever. REVIEW, COMMENT, ALL THAT SHABANG!<strong>

**Thank, yall!**

**~Akira**


	2. Chapter 2

**A.N. I want to clear up one thing: Macey (The original one) is Cammie's cousin in this story. In the last chapter, Little Macey is Zach and Cammie's daughter! This is not a Zacey story. And don't worry, once you find out Little Macey's nickname it won't be as confusing as to which Macey the characters are referring to.**

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><p><strong><span>Chapter Two<span>**

**~Zachary Goode~**

_I heard her walk down the hallway towards me. She wrapped her arms around my waist from behind, her cheek resting on my back._

_"Hey," she said softly with that melting smile of hers._

_"First day as seniors," I commented, closing my locker. I turned in her embrace to wrap my arms around her waist. "Hey, beautiful."_

_She pecked me on the cheek. We didn't care about what the people around us thought. We were just two people in love. They could stuff it up their a-_

_"I've applied to Boston University, Majoring in Forensics and Pre-Law," she grinned and I couldn't help but smile back._

_"You make me feel lazy! I haven't finished my applications," she rolled her eyes and slapped my chest._

_"What am I going to do with you, Mr. Zachary," she pretended to look troubled but I could see the amusement in her eyes._

_"You know you love me," I said smugly._

"Daddy?"

_"Yeah, I do..." her eyes glistened, "So much."_

"Hey, Daddy wake up!"

_I became serious as I said, "I love you more than anything, Cookie," I wiped a strand of hair behind her ear._

_She wrapped her arms around my neck and placed a chaste kiss._

_So soft._

"Daddy, why are you crying while you sleep?"

_Pain. Pain. Pain._

"Do you have nightmare too, Daddy?" Macey's green eyes were the first thing I saw as I woke up.

_You can't cry in front of her. You have to be strong for her._

I didn't bother wiping my tears as I said in a surprisingly steady voice, "How about we get you ready for the day, MC."

She bit her bottom lip and wrinkled her nose as she thought.

_So much like you, baby._

"Alwight, but do you has to go to the cot today, Daddy?" I bit back a laugh as I stared at her crazy bedhead. Her hair was matted at the top, making her look like Frankenstein's wife.

"It's pronounced, _court, _baby," I laughed as she rolled her eyes.

"Thas' what I say Daddy!"

_She's so stubborn. Just like you, Love._

"Whatever you say, darlin'. Let's get that crazy hair of yours tamed before Aunt Macey comes over with your cousin, what do ya say?" I ask.

She jumps into my arms and I actually feel genuinely happy. The pain in the pit of my stomach lessens with my baby girl in my arms. I'm not a complete whole. But I'm getting there.

_I need you to be whole, baby. Please tell me where you are._

* * *

><p><em>"Zach, they assigned me to a new case. A BIG case. This could make my career, babe!" She told me one morning in the kitchen. I sipped my coffee.<em>

_"But, Love, don't you think you should take some time off to recover from labor?" Macey Cameron Goode was born only a week ago. She was sleeping soundly in the crib in the nursery Rachel, Macey, Mom, and our neighbor Grant helped me build in the spare guest room._

_ "But I feel great! Really. But I hate sitting around all day. Seriously, babe, our little one is low maintenance. How did we get so lucky?" she joked. "Plus, it'll only be a few days in Minnesota. My Mom said she would be able to help you with MC."_

_I sighed, giving my best pout, "But who's gonna take care of me?"_

_She laughed. I love her laugh. And slapped my chest playfully. _

_"Oh, babe, you're worse than the baby," she came over and kissed my cheek. "Just don't spoil MC too much while I'm away. That's my job."_

_I smiled contentedly and pulled her onto my lap. I nuzzled my face into her neck and breathed her in. Intoxicating. It was Cammie. Just Cammie._

_ "I love you Cookie. You and MC are my everything, you know that?" I traced her jaw with the tip of my nose, leaving Eskimo kisses until I met her lips. Her breath fanned my face._

_ Coffee and Cammie. _

_Cammie._

_"Mmmm," she could say anything coherent. I smirked smugly._

_"When you come back..." I placed a kiss on her lips, "I have a surprise." I kissed her again, harder, "And we'll celebrate..." kiss, "MC..." kiss, "And your career," kiss,"Right Cookie?" _

_I pulled away so she could confirm._

_"I promise, Zachy-O," she played with the hair at the nape of my neck. "I love you, Zach."_

_"I love you, too, Cam,"_

We never did celebrate. There was nothing to celebrate anymore.

_XxxXxxXxxX_

_MC was crying. She's been crying for hours and Rachel (Cammie's mom) and I didn't know what to do._

_She missed her mom._

_I missed her too._

_It's been three weeks instead of three days like it was initially. She called everyday to check up on us. To tell us she loved us and that things were difficult with the case. She couldn't give us details about the case, just saying that some murderer was on the loose. And who do you call when there's a murderer? Cameron Goode. Investigator Cameron Goode. _

_I was so fucking proud of how far she got with her Major in college. I did too, of course. I was a partner of one of the biggest Law Firms in Boston._

_But she hasn't called in two days. Almost three._

_But we did get a call later that day. _

_"Mr. Goode?" a firm, gruff voice asked over the phone._

_"Yes?" I asked skeptically._

_"Mr. Zachary Goode?" he asked again._

_"Yes." I was growing impatient._

_"Your wife is Investigator Cameron Goode, yes?"_

_Oh, God._

_"Yes..." I'm nervous._

_"I see."_

_Pain._

_"Well, your wife has been reported missing."_

_Pain._

_"She was last seen two days ago at the crime sight."_

_Pain. Pain._

_"But, she hasn't been in her hotel room for three days."_

_Pain. Pain. Pain._

_"Nor can we locate the tracking device on her phone."_

_I'm numb._

_"We found her FBI badge 3.2 miles away from the crime sight. We think she's been kidnapped..."_

_I drop the phone._

_"Mr. Goode?"_

_MC is crying. She just keeps crying._

_"Mr. Goode are you still there?" _

_Why do my cheeks feel wet?_

_"I-I'm h-here," I stumble through my words._

_"We would like you to come out to Minnesota so you can be question by the police about your wife."_

_Pain. Pain. Pain_

* * *

><p>"Hey Daddy?" we were sitting on the couch in the living room. Our house was large for a family of three. The reason being that we wanted at least two more children. There was the master bedroom with the bathroom. The nursery for MC that turned into her own room when she turned five. Two other guest rooms and an office with two desks. We didn't use the other office because when we weren't at work, we wanted to have time together. Always Cam and me.<p>

_God, Cam. Will we ever have the big family like we always planned?_

"Yeah, baby girl?" I asked softly. I tried to be happy for her. I'm only happy with her.

"Can I have blue frosting on my birthday cake tomorrow?" she asked, her green eyes wide, there was a hint of blue near the irises. _Her _shade of blue.

"Sure thing sweet cakes," I said tickling her stomach. "Anything for the Birthday Girl!"

_"AGH! _NO, Daddy, stoppit!" she said through giggles as I tickled her tummy.

_"_What? What did you say, MC?" I joked, tickling her chubby little tummy senseless.

"I say STOP DADDY!" a small little fist came up and knocked me right in the jaw.

"Oh! I'm sorry Daddy! I di'nt mean it!" she said cupping my face with her small hands and gave me a big sloppy kiss on my cheek.

_God, I only need you for this moment to be perfect, Love._

"All better Daddy?" she asked even though it didn't hurt a bit.

"All better, baby," I pulled tightly to me before I fell apart. My tears spilling into my little girl's beautiful hair.

MC wrapped her petite arms around my neck, burying her face into my neck. "I'm sorry, Daddy. Don't cwy. I'm so-sowwy Daddy," she kissed my neck and I nearly broke down.

_I need you Cam. I'm not strong enough. Please, Love._

_Pain. Pain. Pain._

"Knock, knock, anybody home?" came a familiar voice from the hallway.

"Aunt Macey!" MC wiggled out of my arms and ran out of the room and into the hallway.

It gave me time to pull myself together. I didn't want them to see me so unstable.

"Hey, munchkin! What happened to your hair?" I heard Macey chuckle.

"Um, um, Daddy tickled me on the couch, and I punched him!"

Booming laughter came from the hallway as I deemed myself ready. I walked down the hall to see my wife's cousin and her husband talking to my little angel.

"Hey, Zach, I heard you got put in your place, eh? I'm so proud of my little niece," Nick Hansen, Macey's husband, roared with laughter.

I smirked and nodded, taking MC from Macey and holding her as close as possible.

"Uncle Nick, where is cousin Matt?" Macey's son and MC were very close, although they loved to compete with each other.

"Sorry, Little Munchkin Mace, Matt's at a friends house today," Nick said but then added, "Hey, how about I take you over there and you can all play together?"

_Please say no._

She bit her bottom lip and wrinkled her nose. She looks so much like you it hurts, baby.

"Um, um, I want to make blue frosting wif Daddy for my cake tomorrow, Uncle Nick," I let out a sigh of relief.

"Why don't you and Aunt Macey go get the candles so Uncle Nick and I start the barbecue, okay, munchkin?" I placed her down on the floor so she could take her Aunt's hand to walk into the kitchen.

"Okay, love you Daddy," she tugged on my shirt until I knelt down to her level. She grabbed my face in her hands and gave me a kiss on my forehead, pulling away with a 'pop'. She giggled and ran ahead of Macey and into the kitchen, her long hair swaying from side to side.

_Her hair is so long, and her legs are so tiny I'm afraid she'll trip, baby. But I don't have the heart to cut it. It looks just yours._

I take deep breaths as my anchor to this world isn't secure in my arms. I turn reluctantly to see Nick gazing at me in worry but doesn't comment on it.

We walk outside with a couple of beers in our hands, silent but not uncomfortable. Macey met Nick the same year I lost Cammie. Macey was a wreck at the time so I was grateful that she had someone who could comfort her. Nick had become one of my best friends over the years along with some of the neighbors.

_You would approve of your cousin's choice, Cookie. _

He started to heat up the grill as I glanced around the yard. We had a patio out back for the hot summers, though right now everything was wet since it was the beginning of winter in Boston. Beyond the patio was a fair sized field with MC's play apparatus and swing set we bought when we first realized we were going to have a baby. The field was even big enough for a dog to run around.

That's why I'm getting my little angel a yellow Labrador puppy for her seventh birthday. She's been asking for a pet since she turned three.

_You told me not to spoil her, Cookie. You said that was your job._

"Zach..." Nick pulled me away from my thoughts, "You okay man?"

I stared at him in confusion, "Why wouldn't I be?"

"Since, you know, Cammie's anniversary is coming up."

I snorted. I knew damn well her 'anniversary' was coming up. The day she never came back. But how is that a fucking date to celebrate by calling it 'Cammie's Anniversary'? To me it was the worst day of my life. It has been for the past almost seven years.

_It hurts, Cam. It hurts so fucking much._

"You should move on, Zach...it's not healthy for you or for MC," Nick said quietly.

_Oh, fuck, no._

I hit rock bottom.

I slammed my empty beer bottle on the patio table and stared at him with what I hope were raging eyes.

"What the fuck do you know, Nick? What the FUCK do you know?" I yelled. My hands were trembling.

_I miss you, baby._

"You didn't know her! She's my life! Macey and Cameron are my life! How can I fucking MOVE ON? You didn't know her like I did. HELL you didn't even meet her! You don't know what she did for me! For everyone in this Goddamn world! FU-"

"Daddy?" I heard a soft voice behind me.

I didn't realize I was crying.

I noticed my angel was crying.

"I's okay, Daddy," MC ran up to me as I bent down, cradling her to me.

We both cried. For everything.

_I miss you so much, it hurts so bad, Cammie._

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><p><strong>2nd chapter in one day! :D Review?<strong>


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three**

**~Zachary Goode~November 17~**

_"You should move on, Zach...it's not healthy for you or for MC," Nick said quietly._

_Oh, fuck, no._

_I hit rock bottom._

_I slammed my empty beer bottle on the patio table and stared at him with what I hope were raging eyes._

_"What the fuck do you know, Nick? What the FUCK do you know?" I yelled. My hands were trembling._

_I miss you, baby._

_"You didn't know her! She's my life! Macey and Cameron are my life! How can I fucking MOVE ON? You didn't know her like I did. HELL you didn't even meet her! You don't know what she did for me! For everyone in this Goddamn world! FU-"_

_"Daddy?" I heard a soft voice behind me._

_I didn't realize I was crying._

_I noticed my angel was crying._

_"I's okay, Daddy," MC ran up to me as I bent down, cradling her to me._

_We both cried. For everything._

_I miss you so much, it hurts so bad, Cammie._

* * *

><p>"Look...Zach, I'm sorry..." I heard Nick say from where he stood behind me. The barbecue chicken has probably been burned to crap.<p>

I stood up with MC still in my arms. It was times like these that I wanted to lock ourselves out from the rest of the world. I wanted to hide my little girl from the outside. I know that was irrational and that MC's grandmother would try to take custody of her again if I did. Can a father help trying?

"You should leave, Nick," I all but growled at the guy. He didn't know my wife. He didn't understand what it felt like to lose the one person in the world that was more important than your own life. He didn't-doesn't-feel that pain.

"Don't talk to my husband like that, Zachary, or else I will kick your a-assets," she stumbled with her curses, realizing that my seven year old daughter was still present though she had fallen asleep almost instantly.

"Fine. Both of you, OUT!" My words were cold and harsh. I could see the disbelief in Macey's eyes. I haven't acted this way since when _she _first disappeared.

_I was tired as Hell. I kept hearing their questions in my head. _

_"When did you last talk to your wife?"_

_"Did you and Mrs. Goode have any problems within your marriage?"_

_"Why didn't she stay with her baby?"_

_Or the most shocking:_

_"Your wife was one of our best agents. She should have rested after her pregnancy. She probably would have been able to fight off any threat if she wasn't so weak from her recovery."_

_That damn baby._

_That fucking baby._

_That's all anyone cared about. That damn baby._

_What about my **wife?**_

_The **baby **is safe at our house. She doesn't even realize that her mom is gone. _

_Damn that baby to Hell. _

_It's all it's fault._

_It's all that damn baby's fault._

_"Zach?" I could hear Cammie's mother come into view. Her cheeks were flushed and blotchy, her eyes were swollen from crying._

_"Hi Rachel," I deadpanned, slamming the door shut._

_Fucking big mistake._

_As soon as the door slammed shut, a high pitched wailing sound pierced the air._

_"Damnit Zach!" Rachel yells, "I just got her to sleep!" _

_I narrow my eyes and clench my fists. If the dark circles under my eyes didn't make me look like a zombie, my usual green eyes darkening must've made me look like a soul reaper from Hell._

_"GO! Comfort your baby!" Rachel yells at me when the crying gets louder and more frantic. _

_Damn that baby. _

_"Why should I?" I said through my clenched teeth. Something hot and wet dripped down my cheek until slipping off my chin and onto my jacket.  
><em>

_Where are you Cookie?_

_"Because your that baby girl's father! Why the Hell wouldn't you take care of your OWN daughter!" Rachel's own fist clenches. "She needs her father," she said barely over a whisper._

_There's so much pain, Cookie. I can't see our daughter. Not when it's her fault you're gone._

_I let out a shaky breath as I hear the shrieks turn to sobs, "Fine."_

_Rachel sobs into her hands and slides to the floor, shaking uncontrollably as I ascend the stairs. _

_I make it to the front of the nursery door and break down._

**_"Babe, I love you so much, you didn't have to do all of this," I could hear her voice in my head as I remembered when I fist showed her the nursery._**

_"I did it for you. And for my little munchkin," I whispered to myself, eyes closed. _

_The sobs turn irregular with little gasps of air in between._

_I opened the door slowly, my anger growing stronger and stronger._

_I walked over to the crib and looked down at the little month-and-a-half year old girl. _

_"It's all your fault, you know," I said gripping the side of the crib._

_She stopped shrieking out but tears still fell from her innocent eyes. _

_She had no clue how much pain I am._

_"It's your fault that your mom is gone, did you know that? Do you feel anything?" I knew I was being irrational and well...a dick._

_MC just looked up at me with the same eyes as mine, her little hands reaching up for me. I had no intentions of even touching her._

_"Do you realize that it's your fault. everything is your fault!" I screamed at the unknowing child between my own tears. _

_Tears welled back up in her eyes as she tried to stretch her arms even further up to me, her fingers trying to signal for me to pick her up. _

_"NO!" I yelled at her. I could hear knocking on the nursery door. But it was locked._

_"ZACH! What are you DOING!" Rachel yelled through the barrier. _

_Everything else seemed so far away._

_"D-do you even r-realize that...it's all my fault!" I placed my elbows on the edge of the crib and covered my face with my hands. "It's my fault your mommy is gone. It's my fault she isn't here. I-It's m-my fault!" I sobbed._

_ So much pain._

_I need you so bad, Cookie._

_I hurt all over. Make it go away, Love._

_I could hear MC squirming in her crib, kicking her legs and flailing her arms around to try to reach me._

_But everything seems so far away._

_I take my hands away from my eyes to peer down at her. She has her bottom lip pulled into her mouth, her barely visible eyebrows are furrowed and her nose is wrinkled._

_Oh, God, Cookie. She looks just like you._

_I can't take it anymore and lift the little baby into my arms as we both begin to cry again._

_I rub her back in soothing circles until I'm the only one left crying. _

_I cradle her in my arms to see her green orbs looking at me curiously. _

_"You are so beautiful, munckin'" I coo to my baby girl doing a complete 180 from earlier._

_Her hands reach up to hold my face between them._

_"Your mom was beautiful too. You look just like her..." I sigh, "I would always tell her how beautiful she really is. The word 'beautiful' doesn't do your mom justice," I choke on the last part._

_ Her thin strands of dark blond hair sticks to her wet cheeks as she yawns._

_"She would always deny that she was pretty, but no one in this whole universe could compare," the corners of my lips start to turn up but I can't smile. I just can't smile yet. _

_"She had this habit of always getting some kind of midnight snack, hoping I would never notice. Of course I did. She preferred macadamia and chocolate chip cookies, though. When her best friend, Bex-you know, Auntie Bex from next door?-told her that she would get fat one day and regret her 'horrid habit'," I would have laughed at the memory of her shocked expression, "Of course, your mother tried to go on a diet, trying to eat healthy foods along with your Aunt Macey and Aunt Liz. But, I went downstairs one night because your mom was supposed to be working late and I thought a burglar broke in. I wound up find your mom stuffing her face with macadamia chocolate chip cookies," tears slipped down to the tip of my nose and onto MC's cheek._

_ She giggled._

_God, Baby, everything she does is you._

_"I told her I would keep her secret, she told me, "I'm your wife, you damn better keep it a secret. Would you want me to have to lose the bet?" But then I told your mom, "Cookie, you don't need to be on a diet because you are my beautiful, loving wife and you don't need to change a thing. I will even buy you a box of goods so you can get your fix at night when it's just the two of us." I think she took that the wrong way though...but I didn't really care." I say laughing a bit through my tears._

_ MC's bright innocent eyes looked up at me with such innocence...so much...love. _

_I lifted her body closer with one arm so I could nuzzle my nose to her cheek. _

_Strawberries, baby food and you, Cookie. I thought as I inhaled my baby's sweet scent. Her hands rubbed both my cheeks, she gave me a funny look when she felt my scruff. _

_I haven't been able to shave in two weeks._

_"D-Do you want to see a picture of your mommy? You h-haven't seen her in...so...long," I struggled to keep my sobs at bay as I reached over to the small table with the lamp on top to grab one of the pictures of Cammie. _

_ She had her reading glasses on, her dirty blond hair flowing down her sides as she smiled at me as I took the picture of her while she studied her first case. I was studying for the BAR exam and I just couldn't pass up the opportunity when my fiance looked so cute in her glasses. Her smile was big, showing off her straight, white teeth and the slight dimples I learned to adore. You could even see a faint blush rising up her neck._

_ You're so Beautiful, Cookie._

_Perfect._

_I hold up the picture for MC to look at as my head rests sideways against hers._

_Her face breaks into a smile that warms my heart to see._

_So beautiful. So Perfect._

_All we need is you, Cookie._

"We'll be back for my niece's birthday tomorrow, Zach. Until then, I suggest you get your act together. I might not be able to defend you anymore against Aunt Rachel over custody," Macey stormed off the patio and back into the house.

Nick stuffed his hands in his pockets, shaking his head. "I'm sorry, man. I just hate seeing you like this every year."

I wanted to be angry and yell at him to leave me the Hell alone. It was easier to be angry than to pretend to be happy.

But I could see the worry in his expression.

_They just care about me and MC. _

So, I nodded my head at my best friend, forgiving him.

"I'll see you tomorrow," Nick pulled his jacket closer to him as a gust of icy wind swirled around us. I could feel MC start to shiver.

* * *

><p>"Daddy, blue icing does <em>not <em>go on my _nose_," MC squealed as I took the icing spatula and wiped it across my baby girl's face.

I shook with laughter only our daughter could bring in the past almost seven years. Damn did it feel good.

"My hands...OH NO! I'm outta control Munchkin!..." I started to wave the spatula around in the air, swatting her every time with the blue frosting.

"AHHH Daddy! NO!" she giggled, trying to get the frosting out of her hair. "Your hand is evil?" she squeaked.

Suddenly I dropped the spatula and made my hands into claws, "No...I AM THE EVIL JAFAR"

"NOOO, Aladdin save me!" she cried out as I started to chase her around the kitchen island.

Her newest obsession was Disney Princesses, specifically Jasmine from Aladdin. Hence the blue frosting since Jasmine wore that blue getup in the movie. She even asked if she could dye her hair black so she could look like Jasmine. Hell. No.

_I would never change her beautiful hair, Cookie._

"Hey, Daddy...?"

"Yeah, Munchkin?" I asked after the chaos was over, ending in me getting punched in the stomach. Now I MC was placed on the kitchen island as I tried to wipe the blue frosting from her face.

"When is Momma gonna come back?"

She looked so innocent, asking that question.

_Pain. Pain. Pain._

My mouth was open agape. My eyes threatened to gush out another round of waterfalls. My chest twisted in pain.

I knew this day would come. When MC would ask about her mom. I showed her pictures, I told her stories of our childhood together when she couldn't sleep. I played the role of father and mother to our child. Macey Cameron would never hear her mother's voice, she would never know what it was like to have both parents.

_I promised myself long ago that my children wouldn't have that life I had._

_I'm sorry I didn't keep that promise, Cookie._

She would never celebrate Mother's Day. She didn't understand why every year before Christmas I would go through breakdowns. It was _her _'anniversary'. She would know why I have her stay at one of her Aunt's houses in June. That was our wedding anniversary. She wouldn't feel the emptiness in the house that I felt every March 31st when Cammie's birthday arrived.

She would never understand why her father is broken.

Or maybe she would, but she would never fully understand. No one would.

"Daddy...?" MC asked, playing with the collar of my shirt as I came back from my thoughts.

Inhale.

Exhale.

Inhale.

Exhale.

Tear.

Inhale.

Tear.

Exhale.

"Baby..." Damn, my voice cracked, "Your mommy isn't coming back."

She looked at me confused, "Why, Daddy? Di'nt she love us?"

"She loved us very m-much Mace...She just c-can't come back," her expression didn't change, "She's..." I can't say it, "in Heaven, sweety," it came out as a whisper.

She shrugged her shoulders and continued to play with her Jasmine and Belle dolls like nothing happened.

_Pain. Pain. Pain._

_She doesn't know what that means, Cookie. She loves you, too, Love._

_But she doesn't know. She doesn't understand._

_Pain. Pain. Pain._

_She just shrugged as if she was asking me for a fucking ice cream cone but I said 'No'. _

_ So much pain._

* * *

><p>"HAPPY BIRTHDAY!"<p>

I don't know how. I don't know when. But all of a sudden my house was filled to the brim with seven year old girls and their moms.

"Everybody, let's go play outside with the Birthday Girl!" the Jasmine impersonator we hired said, taking her balloon thing with her to go entertain-only God knows-however many kids.

"You're a great father," a lady I've never met before said, holding out her hand. She had blond hair that looked artificial. I looked up at her face and one thing came to mind: Artificial.

"Thanks," I muttered.

"I'm Tina Walters," she says, dropping her hand when I passed on the offer to touch her gangly fingers. "I'm a _single _mom."

Well that just fucking dandy.

Want a cookie?

"It's nice to have someone know what it's like to raise a child on their own. My divorce was Hell! How was yours?" did she just squeeze together her...I don't wanna know.

My eyes darkened at the thought of people think my life was fucked up because I was _divorced _to the woman I've loved for the past 23 years I've known her.

Hell. Fucking. No.

"Listen, Tiara, was it?" I ignored the twitch of her upper lip, "First, I'd appreciate it if you didn't cuss at my seven year old daughter's birthday party. Second, I don't give Crayola about your divorce-as far as I'm concerned, the guy was lucky to get away from you. Third, I am not divorced, nor am I single. My wife was kidnapped, okay? So grab your child and get the HELLO out of my FUDGING HOUSE!"

"Your loss, bastard. It's your fault for leading me on," she huffed and stalked away. That was when I noticed the skanky clothes.

Crazy bit-

"DADDY!" I heard MC yell from the backyard. "Look it! Princess Jasmine made me into a princess!"

I smiled at my daughter. I was still highly irritated.

I shook the thoughts of Artificial Skank out of my head so I could focus on my daughter.

She was all that mattered.

She was in a Princess Jasmine dress, twirling around with her friends as they played music from various Disney movies. She looked so beautiful and happy. So carefree. So innocent.

"Look it, look it, Daddy!" she waved at me from inside the circle with her friends surrounding her. A game of duck-duck-goose.

"That's great sweaty!" I forced a smile as she started to run around to chase after another seven year old boy named Travis. Travis was her cousin Matt's best friend. At least the kid's parents were decent enough.

_I wish you were here, Cookie. I wish you could see how happy Little Macey is. Our little Munchkin._

"Hey, Zach?" I heard Bex-Cammie's best friend and current neighbor-call from inside the house.

"Yeah?" I asked, walking inside.

"Phone is for you. Something about the FBI?"

My eyes narrowed.

I knew the case was closed. But I wasn't going to let them pronounce her dead.

I took the phone from Bex with a nod.

"Zach Goode here. Listen, you better bot be giving up on my wife you people said yourselves she was one of the best-"

"Mr. Goode? Listen to me carefully," that paused my rant.

My curiosity got the better of me.

"We found a lead. We think your wife just tried to make contact to us. We're reopening the case."

* * *

><p><strong>Hey guys! Sorry for the long wait! What do ya think? REVIEW! <strong>

**~Akira**


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four**

**~Zachary Goode~**

_"Hey Zach!" I heard one of my best friends, Grant Newman, yell across the hall._

_"Hey, Grant! Have you seen Cammie?" I heard my voice crack at the end. Damn puberty. I couldn't care less though, I just wanted to see my best friend. I couldn't find her all day and I...well...I missed her. Who wouldn't miss their best friend, right?_

_I tried to maneuver my way through the halls of our middle school. It was an icy January day in Boston and blizzard warnings have been signaled throughout town. It could possibly be the last school day for awhile._

_"Nah, man. I haven't seen Cookie Cams. But you might want to check with her friend...Baxter, right?" I wanted to roll my eyes but I constrained myself. He of all people knew Bex Baxter. He practically worshiped the girl ever since she moved her from London a year ago during the middle of the sixth grade._

_But I was too focused to really care about that. Where was my best friend?  
><em>

_"I already asked her...I'll just call her phone," we said our 'laters' as he went down the hall and out the school doors to start walking home. The last bell had already rung._

_RING RING RING._

_Why hadn't I seen her all day?_

_Was she sick?_

_I bumped into an eighth grader named Luther Finnigan. His cheek looked bruised. He was sort of a freak.  
><em>

_RING RING RING._

_Her mom usually drives her to school...ever since her father passed when we were seven. Could something have happened?_

_YOU'VE REACHED THE VOICE MAIL BOX OF-_

_"Damnit!" I flipped my phone shut and slammed my locker. I looked down the hallway to see I was the only one left._

_I slung my backpack over one shoulder and ran a hand through my messy hair. I could never really get it to stay neat. _

_God, I hope she isn't sick or something. _

_Once I opened the door, I was thrown into the side of the door by the powerful gust of wind and ice showering around me, watering me down from head-to-toe._

_I pulled desperately at the hood of my jacket to place it over my head and wrapped my scarf around tightly. I was used to the strangling sensation a person from California would get if they were to have it as tightly wrapped as I did. _

_As I started down the ice covered sidewalk, I heard my phone start to ring._

_**My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard,**_  
><em><strong> And their like<strong>_  
><em><strong> It's better than yours,<strong>_  
><em><strong> Damn right it's better than yours,<strong>_  
><em><strong> I can teach you, <strong>_  
><em><strong> But I have to charge<strong>_

_Cammie's ringtone!_

_I almost broke the device as I flipped it open. "Cams? Where are you?" I asked into the phone._

_"Actually, Zach, this is Mrs. Morgan! I found Cammie's phone on the ground right beside the front door and figured she would be walking home with you. Isn't she there?" Rachel Morgan's voice never sounded so terrified. Well, not since Mr. Morgan passed..._

_"She's not at home?" I yelled into the receiver. "She wasn't here at school today! I thought she was sick or something," I knew I was starting to panic. _

_Where the Hell was she? If she wasn't at home..._

_I heard her mother whisper expletives on the other end and say, "No, she's not at home. She left this morning for school...Oh, Lord, and this terrible blizzard! I'm calling the police." _

_"Mrs. Morgan, I'll look along the streets!" I had to yell into the phone because it was starting to hail buckets of ice. I shivered as the wind picked up as well._

_"No, Zach. You go straight home! Your parents will worry and you shouldn't be out in this kind of weather!" _

_But I had already hung up. She didn't really think I would go home and listen to this storm while my best friend was probably out here somewhere?_

_Hell. No._

_I began trudging through the snow, rubbing my hands together to try to keep the warm. My nose and ears felt hot, it was so cold out._

_My snow boots plowed into the snow as I trudged along, yelling, "CAMMIE!" _

_"CAMMIE!" I cupped my hands around my mouth so it could carry my voice through the wind. _

_Images of Cammie kept running through my mind. A Cammie lying frozen in the snow, blue faced and unmoving. Cammie crying on my shoulder when she found out her father died and I had climbed through her window to see her. The first day of seventh grade just a few moths ago when she was all I could think about._

_That's when I first thought she was...pretty. Well, of course she was pretty. She's always been. But...How could I have not noticed how beautiful she really was? My best friend!_

_That was the thing, she is my best friend, why am I thinking about her like that? _

_Maybe I would never know..._

_"CAMMIE!" I cried out more frantically, tracing the path we always walked to get to her house before mine, that was just further down the street._

_That's when I saw her._

_I saw her blue trench coat half buried around two inches of snow. Her black boots were slightly sticking up. _

_I ran and ran until I reached her._

_"Cammie!" I yelled, digging the snow away to reveal a shivering semi-conscious Cammie. Her dirty blond hair was spread out around her head like a...fallen angel...but that's stupid to think of your best friend like that._

_Her mouth was moving slightly, a barely audible whimper was all she could manage. I dug underneath the snow, getting a firm grip around her waist and behind her knees. _

_Lifting her up, I cradled her head against my chest and towards my chest. I peeled off her drenched, cold gloves and saw the first signs of frost bite on her fingers. I then took off her boots and socks, which were both drenched through-and-through. Next came her jacket, tossing it to the side as I unzipped my own to wrap it around her better._

_I looked around frantically as I rubbed her arms to try to warm her up a bit so she would get hypothermia. She was already unconscious.  
><em>

_Oh, God._

_The blizzard was getting stronger and stronger every second that passed. _

_We would die out here if we didn't get warm. Our houses are too far away and no one would dare to come out to get us any time soon. Besides, my phone was probably already broken because of the storm.  
><em>

_"Zachary!" I spun my head around to see Mrs. Cope, a friendly old lady down the street call out from her house. She was wrapped in some kind of fur coat, a mug in her gloved hands as she stood in front of her front door. "Get inside! Quickly!" _

_We lived in a small town in Boston, a place where everyone knew everyone's business. But, everyone had to know Mrs. Cope. She was like...a midwife...the town bakery that didn't charge taxes. So, it wasn't weird or strange to waltz into her house when you had no where else to go. Plus I didn't give a damn at this point._

_Cammie.  
><em>

_I didn't bother answer Mrs. Cope, my voice felt sore and weak from shouting earlier for Cammie. I picked her up with ease and ran up the steps to Mrs. Cope's house. I instantly felt warmer, more relaxed. There were candles lit everywhere, old Christmas decorations still hung about the house. It smelt of cinnamon  
><em>

_She closed the door and bent down beside me to look at Cammie. "Oh, dear, she's got a bit of Frostnip on her fingers and toes!"_

_ I chewed on my lower lip, stroking Cammie's wet hair unknowingly. "Will she be okay?" I croaked. Damn Puberty._

_"She should be find, just let me warm up some water so we can soak her phalanges. Come, help me get her up into the guest bedroom, will you dear?"_

_I nodded and picked her up, walking up the stairs with the old lady leading the way. _

_"How did you two kids get caught up in that dreadful storm?" she inquired as she unlocked the door and motioned for me to set her down on top of the bed._

_"I was walking home from school and...Cammie, she's my best friend and...she didn't show up for school and I found her lying in the snow on the way home..." Retelling the story made my chest twist and knot. _

_I thought she died._

_"Well, dear, you are a very good friend for saving her life, like you did. Why don't I get you two some fresh clothes for you to change into. It's not good to wear wet clothes in this weather, deary!" And with that she left the room to warm up water and get fresh towels and clothes and some warm blankets._

_After I went into the bathroom to change, Mrs. Cope changed Cammie into some long pajama pants and two long sleeved thermal shirts. We would wait until she was conscious to soak her hands and feet in warm water._

_"I'm just going to clean up the damp carpet and then you can call your parents to let them know you're both alright, okay deary?" Mrs. Cope glided out the door without a second glance. Then there were two._

_I glanced at Cammie who was now lying under the warm comforters of the queen sized bed. She looked more at peace. Paler than usual, but peaceful. I let out a breath I didn't know I had been holding and relief spread through me. _

_I could have lost her if she wasn't found. What had happened to her, though? Cammie was known to be a clutz. Not a nerd but not popular. Neither was I. And if anything, I noticed some other guys realize how pretty she really was. Just as I had. Her hair that looked like cookies and milk-another reason for her nickname. Her green-blue eyes that knew me so well. Her deep red lips were a pale pink now, a little swollen on her lower lip. She was probably biting down on it again. Then there was the rest of her..._

_Damn Puberty._

_But I quickly became somber again as I realized I almost lost all of that. All of her. I can't even begin to imagine...to even dream of not..._

_I can't live without Cammie. She's my other half. We did everything, for crap's sake!_

_What would I do without her? Hang out with Grant? _

_Ha, that was a good one._

_No. No one could ever replace my very best friend. She knew me too well. She knew all of my secrets, and I knew hers. I knew her better than myself and vice versa. _

_Besides, who else would let me call them Cookie?_

_"Okay, hun. You can go call your parents now. Cammie's too, don't forget!" she said as she handed me the wireless phone. I sat down on the edge of the bed beside Cammie, observing her frostnip fingers and tracing her palm as the phone rang._

_I called all of the rents to let them know what was going on. They agreed that we should stay the night with Mrs. Cope so that we wouldn't risk going outside. The blizzard kept plowing on._

_I had hung up the phone already and just lied down beside Cammie on top of the covers in an old sweater and pants Mrs. Cope's son used to own._

_ Cammie's hair suddenly fascinated me as I began to play with it mindlessly, just thinking. I knew what I had to do when she woke up. _

_But it still scared the crap outta me. I was only thirteen! I'm not even sure how to do this type of thing..._

_"Deary?" Mrs. Cope knocked on the door and peeked in at me. "Oh, she's still not up?"_

_Way to shove it in my face._

_"No," I shook my head._

_"Oh...well, are you hungry? I can cook up something for you," she asked, tying up her old, graying hair into a bun._

_I thought about it for a moment. I wasn't too hungry. Not right at the moment. But if Cammie left and got stuck in the storm before she got to school, that would mean she hasn't eaten ten hours. _

_And she eats like a horse._

_"Actually, do you mind if I cook something for Cammie when she wakes up...I uh, know what she likes...That is if you have the ingredients," I replied nervously. I was going to do this. She might get freaked out but...I have to try. She's the only one I'd ever do this for._

_XxxxXxxxXxxx_

_"Well, aren't you a sweet boy. She's lucky she's got you, deary, you're a keeper."_

_I felt my cheeks and neck burn at that comment._

_"Uh, can I ask for advice...I mean...you're a...uh, girl," an old one._

_"Sure, Deary, anything," she said as we sat in the living room by the fire after working in the kitchen._

_It was now approaching 7PM and Cammie still hadn't woken up yet, though her fronstnip was getting better when we decided to just soak her fingers and toes anyways._

_"What if...what if she doesn't like it...I mean, what if she doesn't...like...you know-" I stuttered._

_Mrs. Cope just laughed, interrupting me and said, "Oh, Deary, she'll love it. She'll love everything you've done for her. I just think it's terribly sweet...It reminds me of my late husband..." her eyes turned glassy as she reminisced._

_ I nodded, only feeling slightly better._

_"I'll go see if she's awake..." I said, grabbing the plate of food to bring up to her if she was awake._

_She wasn't awake when I walked in, at least I didn't think so. But when I set the plate of chocolate chip cookies down on the bedside table and sat beside her on the bed, her eyes started to flutter open._

_"Z-Zach..." her voice was hoarse but it made me relax completely to know that I hadn't lost her. She was here._

_"Hey Cams," I took her fingers and toes out of the little bowls of warm water and put the covers back over her. "You feeling okay?" I asked._

_"Uh, yeah...where are we?" she glanced around the room, but the realization hit her and her swollen, bottom lip started to tremble. "Oh, God, Zach, this guy...I don't know who...he was my height and he...he tried to grab me, telling me he wanted to ditch school with me or something...I didn't even know him and I punched him but...next thing I know I'm here..." _

_I sat down beside her while she was talking, throwing an arm around her shoulders.I could tell she didn't want to talk about her encounter just yet...but I knew she would have questions. So, I covered the basics.  
><em>

_"I found you covered in snow on my way home. A blizzard started when I found you so Mrs. Cope let me bring you inside. You had frostnip on your fingers and toes but it should be better now. Maybe a little swollen..." I sighed, squeezing her shoulder._

_She wrapped and arm around my waist and resting her head against my shoulder, "So you saved me, huh?" _

_I smirked, "Yeah, I guess. Pay up."_

_She shoved my shoulder with hers and giggled. Music to my damn ears._

_"No, really, Zach. Thank you. Without you I would probably still be out there."_

_We were quiet for a moment, listening to the wind roaring outside._

_"Come on...it's what best friends are for," I'm so damn stupid. Her smile faltered a bit. I CAUGHT THAT! I'm so fucking stupid!_

_"Yeah...uh huh," she sighed and bit her bottom lip, wincing a bit._

_I reached out and pulled her bottom lip from her teeth, her lip a little more swollen. _

_That sent..something straight south._

_ FUCK PUBERTY!_

_I stared at her lips, warm, soft, and a bit swollen. _

_She was just beautiful. _

_"Zach?" her voice was soft and concerned. _

_I looked back up at her eyes, still holding her chin in between my fingers._

_She was so close. Her warm exhale spread over my face._

_"You can..." she trailed off. That's when I noticed she was staring at my lips too! _

_Does she want me to?_

_Holy shit, does she want me to kiss her?_

_"I mean if you don't want to..." she said nervously._

_"No, I really want to," I blurted out. What the Hell?_

_"Then kiss me already, Goode." she seemed breathless._

_I think I just got hard._

_That's when I smashed our lips together. From here on out, we would never be just friends. _

_We kissed, and kissed. Soon our tongues started to explored our mouths. Her hands found their way to my hair. I had to dig my nail into my palms to keep from touching her. Who knew what would have happened if I allowed that._

_We just kept kissing, never stopping. The sounds of our lips moving together and the storm outside were all I could hear, the chocolate chip cookies and Cammie's intoxicating scent were all I could smell. And I loved all of it._

_I loved that freaking storm for trapping us in here and allowing me to do what about a third of the guys at school wish they could have with my best friend...what were we now? I loved the feel of her lips and tongue against mine. I loved the way her hair fell over our faces as she leaned forward towards me. I loved/hated that we were on a freaking bed! Damn puberty. Again._

_But most of all I just loved Cammie. I just love how we fit so perfectly. I know we're just thirteen, but...I love her._

_She finally broke off, both of us grinning like fools. _

_"We should do that more often," she pressed her forehead to mine._

_"Definitely. How about we just never stop?" I asked hopefully. _

_"Hmm...did you make those?" she asked, pointing to the cookies._

_I laughed and nodded, swearing that they were edible._

_So, we sat under the covers like we always did ever since we were born, except now everything was different. We ate the cookies that I made, that she admitted tasted fantastic. _

_We talked a bit more. Kissed a lot more until we fell asleep, ending the best night of my life with the girl I love in my arms._

* * *

><p><strong>~Cammie Morgan~<strong>

I tried sneaking out baby, I really did.

I'm so sorry I failed you again. I've tried so many times in the past seven years but Luther_ always finds me. He always catches me. And I always get a beating for it. _

_I've lost hope, Zach, I'm so fucking sorry, but I've lost hope._

I've come to terms that I won't see you or MC again. I know I won't see mom or Mace.

How are they babe? Please tell me they've moved on, that they don't dwell on me too much.

Have you moved on, Hubs? If you have...I would understand...

But, God, I love you. I love you and MC too much to kill myself, to get away from this misery. But there's always been a flicker of hope every now and then. As Luther moves me from state to state, there's always a bit of hope that someone would find a way...that they would find me. That I would come home to you babe. You and MC.

It's always been you, Zach. Only ever you.

* * *

><p><strong>A.N. Sorry it took so long for this one! I'm gonna be on vaycay (woot twoot) next week so I might not get another one up by then. Anyways, WHAT DO YOU THINK? Whadya think of that flashback of their first kiss? Who's Luther? What's gonna happen to Cammie? Tell me your thoughts. Your reviews are my own personal Sharpie...I could sniff it all day :{D<strong>

**~Akira**_  
><em>


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five**

**~Zachary Goode~**

When your best friend and wife has gone missing, officials assuming she was killed, it tears your entire being. It drains the life from you, consuming you with contrite thoughts for yourself. You forget how to live. You forget, momentarily, that you have a living-breathing-child that you both helped create. You lose sight of all things rational and those memories-those painful memories-of the years you spent together become distant and tangible simultaneously.

That, has been my life for the past seven years.

.

.

.

"Zach, pick up the damn phone!" Bex picked up the device and pushed it against my chest. For a moment I couldn't register anything moving around me. Every memory of heartbreak and remorse of that first year without _her _came flooding back.

"Hello…? Mr. Goode..?" said the voice of the FBI agent.

Bex gave me a look so I decided not to test fate, "I-I'm here…"

_It hurts so much._

Grant came up behind Bex and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. I didn't realize before, but Bex looked wary. Her eyes were wide with anticipation and grief. I understood why. Cammie and Bex had been best friends ever since Bex moved to our little town in Boston. They had been closely knit, them and Macey. The three of them did everything together, especially considering Bex's boyfriend happened to be one of my best friends-Grant, and Macey had many one-night-stands, resulting in many group dates.

Right after we graduated from Cherrytop South High School, we decided to get married, much to my father's doubt. But at least everyone else seemed to except this, not that we would've cared. It wasn't like we were high school sweethearts. We weren't rushing into an anything. We've known each other for over thirteen years, dating for almost seven.

During college, Cammie, Bex, Grant, and Macey all went to Boston University. Cammie and I had gotten an apartment together that we lived in for two years before Cammie and I had enough credits to graduate undergrad and go to Law School. Years later, when I was twenty-three and Cammie was two months shy of the same age, we discovered that Cammie was pregnant with our little girl-Cammie being two and a half months along already.

We both had steady jobs. I was moving up in a prestigious law firm, and Cammie was quickly branching up in the FBI, becoming a well known agent in not just the Boston area, but within the whole Bureau. I was extremely proud of the amazing woman I was privileged to call my wife. But, when she reached six months, the beginning of the last term of her pregnancy, she was told to go on maternity leave. She refused unwaveringly until I convinced her that I wanted my family safe. That if anything were to happen to them if she were out on the field, I wouldn't be able to live with myself. She agreed by throwing up on my shoes. Apparently she still had morning sickness now and then. Her doctor put her on bed rest after that.

The rest was a painful memory of our last moments together, one week of our family being whole.

One fucking week of our family being whole.

"Oh good, you're still there…" I heard him sigh over the phone. "Do you have a moment to talk?"

"It's my little girl's birthday party," I rubbed the heel of my hand against my aching forehead. "My wife's case has been left cold for six years…" I croaked.

Damn, my chest.

"I know sir, it will only take a minute."

I was so tired of these officials talking bull. The first year of the case was hard enough. The questions they asked were too…exposing…too personal.

What side of the bed did you and your wife sleep on?

Were you both sexually active?

Were you both sexually active with each other or were there…indiscretions?

Did you fight?

Did you abuse your wife…did you abuse her while she was pregnant?

_I'm not strong enough, Angel…I'm sorry. So sorry._

"Where's my wife?" My head is pounding. MC and her friends are playing outside with the Jasmine impersonator. I can see the snow clouds rolling in.

It's definitely winter.

"We got word that she contacted the police in Sedona, Arizona…"

So far away…

"Now, the local police in Sedona and the FBI agency down there are gathering a search party. She contacted the police from a pay phone at a Safeway grocery store in Aerlis County in Sedona."

"Is there any way to track her? Did anyone see her? What about video footage?" My mind was racing with all of the possibilities.

"We are going over the video footage from the grocery store and the gas station right next door. There is in fact footage of your wife that we would like for you to see. As far as witnesses, there are three: the manager of the store, a soccer mom, and a business man; CEO of Townsend Investments. They were taken by bureau officers to be questioned. That's all of the information we have right now. It is 11 AM in Boston, correct?"

I checked the time on my watch. "Yes?"

"It's 9 o'clock in Arizona, she contacted the police at 7:16 AM."

"I'm catching the next flight to Arizona," I told the government official.

"I wouldn't recommend that, Mr. Goode," he said warily over the phone.

The damn official!

"Why the Hell not?" I seethed. Don't deny me my wife.

"Sir, you'll only make things more difficult. It would be best if you went to the FBI agency your wife worked for and had them run you through the information. You have to understand that if we are unable to locate your wife…you may become…irrational."

No fucking way.

"Listen…My wife has been gone for seven fucking years. If you think for a goddamn second that I'm going to stand by and wait for you bastards to sit on your asses for another goddamn seven years, you've got a lot of fucking problems."

Seven years is long enough. Seven fucking years of Hell.

"Just stay put for now, sir. If we get anymore information I will contact you immediately. Otherwise I will update you in a few hours," the man said sympathetically. "My name is Agent Solomon. Ask for me if you contact the FBI in Boston. Goodbye now, Mr. Goode."

With that, he hung up.

I noticed MC tugging on Macey's skirt, asking if I could come and have her birthday cake. Her dirty blond hair was in a long braid, she wore a Jasmine costume and the necklace with the bunny charm that I got her when she was born.

My baby girl was seven now. Seven years without a mother. Have I failed her? What would Cammie say if she saw me now? Would she be happy with the choices I've made? Would she have wanted me to move on? Would she have disapproved of my constant hostility to everyone I interacted with? Would she have frowned at me for losing my job at the law firm I worked for when she was still here.

Where was she? Now that I know she's alive…has she been abused? Has she been…God, has she been violated?

_Please tell me you're okay, Cookie. I need you to be okay._

Deep breaths.

Exhale.

Inhale.

"_Zach?" _

Exhale.

"_No, Zach! Put me down!"_

Inhale.

"_No, I don't think I will. What are you going to do about it, Cookie?" I asked Cammie. _

_She laughs in my arms and her nose tickles my neck and her warm breath spreads goosebumps all over my skin as she says, "Think, this is our last Christmas before we move in together…well, officially," she places a kiss on my neck, over my pulse spot._

"_Well, Angel, then I can't wait for this Christmas to be over," I say as snow drifts around us._

"_And why's that?" she asks as my I pull her closer into my embrace, as I am holding her bridal style outside on the dock on the lake next to Mrs. Cope's house. _

_Her arms are securely wrapped around my neck, her fingers threading through my hair._

_I ignore her question and place her down on the dock, glancing at the frozen lake before looking back at Cammie. Her pale skin made her cold, pink nose and ears stand out. Her lips warm and cherry red._

_God, how I would love to ravish those lips._

"_Do you remember our first kiss?" I whisper into her ear as her fingers thread back into my hair and I hold her securely around the waist, because knowing Cammie, she would slip on the frozen floor of the wooden deck._

"_How could I forget? You saved my life and made me cookies," she whispers with gratified sigh. _

"_It was in the guest room of Mrs. Cope's house," I agreed softly._

"_I can't believe she's still alive," Cammie joked as we both laughed silently, just enjoying our moment together. No school. No interrupting friends. No on looking parents who didn't exactly know that Cammie and I weren't exactly…pure. We knew that we were it for each other. I knew that there would be no one that I would love other than Cammie. I've been faithful to her for seven years of our strong relationship and I would continue to be for the rest of my life._

_That's what I needed to talk to her about right now._

_Well, ask her._

"_That was when I realized I love you," I say, looking her in her beautiful emerald eyes. _

_Her fingers paused, tangled in my hair as her lips formed into a loving grin._

"_I knew it before," I raised an eyebrow, "when that Jessica girl asked you out in sixth grade to the dance. God, I was so jealous," Cammie laughs into my chase, blushing furiously. _

"_I saw that smug look you got when I turned her down," I laughed, "I didn't know why at the time, but now it makes perfect sense." _

_We both laughed until it died away in to the soft breeze as it continued to snow around us. I couldn't remember a nicer Christmas Eve; there were usually storms._

"_I love you, Cammie," I said resting my forehead against hers. _

"_I love you too," she said closing her eyes._

"_I'll love you forever," I replied, "Forever used to seem impractical, but with you there…it seems complete."_

_I think she knew what was about to happen as she sounded nervous and…lustful when replied, "I'll love you no matter what happens."_

"_Then lets make this happen, Cammie," I say and her breathing hitches, "Marry me."_

_Her eyes snap open and her eyes start to water. _

"_You're my best friend, my lover, my life, Cameron Morgan. You're strong, incredibly beautiful, and incredibly smart. You've put up with me for this long and I want you by my side forever. I want to be able to tell people that I'm the lucky bastard that gets to call you his wife. You've helped me throughout bad times, especially when my father died. You understood how it felt. You're the only one that truly understands me. And I can't live without you. I don't want to lose you. So please…" I get on one knee and pull out the ring, "Be my wife?"_

_one moment she's standing there in her boots and scarf looking so beautiful, and in the next she's barreling on top of me, my back on the frozen dock._

"_Yes…"kiss, "I will be your wife, Zachary Goode," kiss, "I will marry you," she says kissing my lips one last time before staring down at me with a wide smile. _

_I'm smiling like a doofus._

"_Really?" I ask incredulously._

"_Yes!" she has joyous tears in her eyes, "I love you."_

"_Forever?" I ask hesitantly while slipping the Tiffany's engagement ring-I've been saving for three months-on her ring finger._

"_Forever." She says firmly._

My mind snaps out of the memory as a tear slips down my cheek, "What happened to forever, Angel?"

* * *

><p>"Daddy, you want to know what I wished for when I blew out the candles?" MC asks as I tuck her into her bed. She reaches for her stuffed bunny that she got the day she was born to match the necklace. Yes, I spoil my daughter even though I work independently as a computer specialist. I don't earn as much of a salary as I did when I worked for the law firm, but it keeps a roof over our heads.<p>

"What's that, munchkin?" I ask placing her socks on. It would be getting colder soon.

Right when she fell asleep I would call Agent Solomon on updates.

"I wished for a mommy for Daddy," she said smoothing out the blanket over her legs. "Because Daddy seems lonely without a mommy and I want a mommy, so's I wished for a mommy," she says smiling at me.

_I'm crushed. We need you Cookie. Our MC doesn't remember you. I try. I've tried, Angel, but she doesn't know…she doesn't…notice your absence like I do._

_Oh, God, it hurts, Cam. _

_Pain. Pain. Pain. _

"You have a mommy, sweetie. Don't you remember?" I grab the picture of Cammie on her bedside table and hold it up for her to see.

"See right there? That's mommy. And she loves you and me, so much." I tell her. hopefully she will listen this time. She doesn't know, doesn't believe that Cammie loves us. It's always the same answer:

"But why would she leave us then, Daddy?" there are tears. So many tears that I can't tell if they're MC's or mine.

"She didn't want to leave, baby. I promise. But she's coming back. She'll be back so soon, baby," I say holding her little hand in mine.

"She's not my momma…she don't love me. So she's not my mommy," and I snap. It's the same thing over and over again. It's the doubt in everyone; it's me not being enough for our child.

"SHE IS YOUR MOM, MC! STOP THIS AT ONCE. YOUR MOTHER LOVES YOU. UNDERSTAND? IF I HEAR YOU SAY THAT AGAIN YOU'RE GROUNDED!" I yell and now I realize we're both crying.

"Y-yes, Daddy," she sobs. My expression softens, anger and frustration forgotten.

And now I feel like such a dick.

_I'm not strong enough, Cookie._

"Oh…I'm so sorry MC…I didn't mean to yell," I reach out to hold her but she pulls the blanket over her head.

"G-Goodnight, Daddy," she sobs. She's obviously sad and angry but-like her mother-tries to not be rude.

_I'm such a bad father, Cammie. Please…_

"Goodnight, Angel…I love you," I say softly, kissing the top of her head that is exposed.

My response are sobs and I feel even worse as I walk back into my own room.

Sitting on my side of the bed, I rest my head in between my legs and breathe deeply-a technique I've learned calms me.

I reach for my phone in my pocket without looking up, and dial the number that I knew all too well.

"Agent Solomon," the voice says after a series of dial tones.

"Update, please."

"We were able to see you wife's captor, Mr. Goode. We were just about to inform you," he says and my heart leaps into my throat.

"W-Who is it?" I ask through gritted teeth, ready to kill the fucker.

"Luther Finnigan."

_Oh, Hell, not him again._

* * *

><p><strong>A.N. Sorry for the long wait, but I got my laptop back so I'll be able to update! This story might turn into a rated M, depending if I want to add a scene that's a little graphic...not sure yet, tell me what you think! Plus! Cammie's POV next chapter, and tell me if you want her flashback next chapter to be that M rated scene...idk. <strong>

**~Akira**


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter Six**

_Well they're some sad things known to man_

_But ain't too much sadder than__The tears of a clown when there's no one around_

_Oh yeah, baby baby,_

_oh yeah baby baby_

_Now if I appear to be carefree_

_It's only to camouflage my sadness_

_And honey to shield my pride I try_

_To cover this hurt with a show of gladness_

_But don't let my show convince you_

_That I've been happy since you_

_'Cause I need to go, oh I need you so_

_Look I'm hurt and I want you to know_

_For others I put on a show ..._

_(Tears of a Clown~Smokey Robinson)_

**~Cameron Morgan-Goode~**

**November 17****th****, 4:00 AM**

Small sheen of light filtered through the attic. The sound of scuffling mice, the dust collecting in the corners, cobwebs stuck to my hair, and that voice.

That horrible voice that gave me nightmares. That voice that haunted me. His sneer before he would slap me.

The lust in his eyes as he looked at me. making me feel exposed, like prey. He looked at me as if he thirsts my blood, that I was his personal drug that would sate him whenever he pleased.

He doesn't realize that it hurts me. All of it.

But he does.

And he enjoys it.

"Cameron, darling," he calls out. He thinks I love him. He thinks we're married. Maybe it was because the first day he found me…he saw the rings on my finger. The rings you gave me, baby.

And I hate him for it. The rings that I keep on my shoelace so he won't take them away. They belong to you and me, hubby. But he doesn't know that. And he never will find out about you.

He might find you too.

And MC.

Oh, God, MC…how is she, baby? I haven't seen her in…so long. How long has it been? I rarely go outside. _He _keeps me locked up. I don't know the difference between night and day.

And…baby, it's so cold. I feel so cold in the shirt and yoga pants. They're old and grimy…I've worn them for months now. _He _lets me take a shower every two weeks but…never new clothes. My old clothes was a big shirt and seats…but they got to big. I'm so skinny. Would you recognize me, baby? Would you still love me? Would you still think I'm beautiful?

I remember those lazy days by the lake or in the cabin in the forest my grandparents owned. You used to tell me how beautiful I was. But I never believed you, did I? Now would you finally agree with me? That I'm plain…but I'm not just plain now, am I? I'm…broken.

So broken without you.

I'm so scared. So frail and…God, I need you. I need you so much because I love you, baby. I love you so much it hurts.

There's so much pain…and if _he _is right at the door to this cold, dirty, attic…there will be more pain.

It's inevitable, Zach.

No matter what he does, no matter where he touches, where he violates me…

I love you.

"Time to go!" _he _yells. He walks toward me.

He has that look in his eye again, baby. You would have been strong if it were you who was gone. Taken.

You used to say, "_I'm a Goode. We can get through anything. We don't give up, and we don't back down to anyone."_

I would roll my eyes at you, thinking you were so cocky and full of it.

But, now I realize that you were right.

The day of our wedding…you said, "_Now you're a Goode. You know what that means?" _

Your smile was so beautiful. I've never met a man as heartbreakingly beautiful as you as I replied, "_We'll get through anything, hubby. We won't give up no matter what, and we won't back down_. _Forever, right?" _

"_Forever."_

Forever, baby.

I cry as he grabs my frail arms. I can't walk. Or maybe I've forgotten. There was no reason to walk very much.

So, he carries me to the van parked out back. It's the first time in months that I've been able to breathe in fresh air. That I've really been able to breathe.

But there's still that pain in my chest.

His arms don't feel safe.

God, baby, I wish his arms were yours. I wish I could lean back and be able to kiss your neck. I want to feel the steady pulse of your heart.

I need it so bad.

I have to close my eyes at the faintest light of the sun peeking out behind the desert terrain.

Desert.

Aerlis County.

Where in Hell is Aerlis?

"Now, listen, darling. You don't make a sound, alright? You stay right here in the van, all nice and quiet while I get some food. If you do…maybe I'll give you extra?" he then looked at me slyly, "And then some."

Damn you.

"Damn you," I say in a hoarse voice. I don't know the last time I talked.

He laughs then and places me in the van.

"Shut up, Cammie, or else you won't deserve food or a shower. You're my wife. You do as I say. Women don't hold power over men, remember?" his voice is brooding. His crazy, brown eyes are filled with dominance, his black hair is greasy. He knows I fear him. He's beaten me enough to know when I'm weak.

I bite back my tongue to defend my gender, but it would be futile anyways.

I glare at him with angry eyes, tears still flowing.

"STOP STARING AT ME LIKE THAT!" he yells and slaps me across my face, "Listen, bitch, you show me no disrespect. That includes you fucking body language."

He pulls the ropes bound around my wrists and ankles tighter until they're digging into my bruised skin. I feel so weak and I know I'm malnourished and dehydrated.

But he doesn't care.

He pulls down a black bag over my head, shielding my eyes and causing my breathing to falter.

I want to touch my boney cheek where his filthy hands abused me. I obviously can't. I cry.

And cry.

He drives in silence.

And I cry.

I cry because I don't know how much longer I can survive this. I don't know how much longer I can keep surviving. I want to believe that one day this will all be over and I will be in your arms again, but I'm running out of options. I'm a trained FBI agent, but it seems that every attempt, every loophole I've found, he's seen. It's as if he knows what my next actions will be.

It scares me how well he knows me.

But I'm not me, am I?

No, I'm not Cameron Morgan-Goode. Agent, wife, daughter, and mother.

No, I'm a victim, a weak, memory to the rest of the world. I feel myself fading. Does that mean you're forgetting me, baby? Have you moved on?

I always knew that you would be the greatest father. I knew you loved our daughter and that you still do. Our greatest creation.

I love you Hubby.

You will always be my Zachy.

I'll always be your Cookie.

But I feel myself giving up.

Would you understand, baby? Would you forgive me for giving up? Goodes aren't supposed to back down, I know this. We had forever and suddenly…it's gone. It's gone and it's all my fucking fault. Why didn't I just stay with my family? Why did I put my passion for work above _you, _Zach. How could I do that to MC?

Please forgive me.

I still remember the day when Luther thought it was time I gave him my body. He said I owed it to him, he says he saved me from a murderer. He believes he's my hero, when it's really you, babe. He believes our memories-though I don't know how he knows of them-are his and mine.

He left me exposed, so exposed. His filthy hands roamed all over my body as he violated me. He saw the scar from my C-section when giving birth to MC.

He yelled at me. Called me unfaithful. He abused me, asking me who the father is, where the baby is. But I wouldn't tell. Then he continued to violate me, forget about the incident until suddenly he would visit me wherever he had me tied down-an attic, basement, closet-and ask the same questions again.

I shuddered at the memories as we drove. And we drove for what seemed like days but was really only about an hour.

I heard his door slam shut, knocking me into the side of the dark van. I could hear nothing, see nothing, as I heard a ripping noise. There was something sharp in the van, the opposite side he tied me to. But I then realized that the ripping sound came from the ropes that bounded my feet.

Then, my years of training kicked in as I fumbled to find an exit. There were blinds shielding the windows of the van in front, so there was no light streaming in.

My heart pounded wildly in my chest before my bound hands reached a door handle. I thought about trying to find that sharp edge again to cut the ropes at my wrists, but it would take to long and I was limited on time. Plus, the fact that I could accidently injure myself and God knows Luther wouldn't give me the proper supplies to clean a wound.

No, I had to focus on getting out.

The door was locked securely, as I figured. But, this was an old, rusty van. The locks were probably old and banged up, and so were the door hinges. So, if I applied enough pressure, I could probably get the door to bust open.

God, let this work, or else I'm screwed.

Literally.

Since I need to save my energy-what little I have-to run once I escape, I kneel on my shaky knees and get ready to plow my frail body into the side of the rusty metal door.

One.

Two.

Deep breath.

Three.

I bang into the side as I hard as I can, but it doesn't open.

But, I hear the hinges squeak.

I ram the side of the van door again. And again. And again.

In a moment I'm lying on blistering hot, gravel ground. The bag atop my head falls to the floor, making me have to squint in pain from the dawn sun.

I look to my left and see Luther buying a packet of Marlboro at a gas station. He's too far away to have heard me break out.

I look to my right and see a Safeway grocery store.

When the doors open to let a tall, blond man walk into the store, I see a cashier. Someone who could immediately call the police. I stumble to my feet.

I'm practically limping, stumbling on my feet to get to the cashier. It's so close, yet so far.

"HEY!" I hear him. He's sprinting towards me from the gas station, cigarettes forgotten.

I know I won't make it to the cashier on time. This early in the morning there's no one else around. I could try to scream but my voice is hoarse from not using it.

"Help," I cry out but it comes out below a whisper as my voice gives out.

I hear the pounding of his feet behind me. I know if I turn around, I would see murder in his eyes.

But then I see it. It's just beside the door to the Safeway. A payphone booth.

My feet are blistering from the heat of the parking lot. I trip and stumble the rest of the way to the payphone and press the emergency button.

"9-1-1, what's your emergency?"

My voice comes out in a whisper as I try to yell, "I'm Cameron Ann Morgan-Goode! Help-"

"PUT THAT DAMN PHONE DOWN!" he grabs around my waist and tries to pull me away.

The lady from 9-1-1 is shouting something through the phone, but I can't understand it. All I can think about is how I've failed.

I struggle in his grip as he runs back towards the van, throwing me inside.

Oh, God, help me.

Please.

Help me, Zach. I need you so much.

I need to be in your arms, to tell you I love you.

I need to tell you that I'm so sorry.

I need to ask you to forgive me.

I've given up. That was my last chance.

His filthy fist makes contact with my jaw as he closes the van door behind us.

"YOU STUPID BITCH!" he yells, "WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU DOING!" SLAP.

Tears mix with blood and one of my swollen eyes is completely shut.

"We're moving again. We can't go back now because of you! No shower or food this week, you whore. Got it? Was that a sign of mistrust? Do you not trust your own husband? Or is this about that fucking baby?"

He pushes me back against the floor of the van, "I guess we'll have to go someplace to rekindle our love, hmm, darling?"

Then I feel his lips on my swollen, dry, bloody ones and I want to puke.

Soon, we're driving. We're driving the fuck away from Aerlis County-wherever the Hell that is.

The next chance I get, I will die.

* * *

><p><em>The wedding was small. We had our families come: Zach's mom, Melissa, my mother, Rachel, Aunt Abby, Macey, and Zach's cousin Jonas who he barely sees along with his girlfriend Liz. Our maid of honor and best man, Bex and Grant, are there. <em>

_All of our old friends from the area come to our small wedding ceremony on the dock by the lake. It's late Spring, just after graduation, and there's tall grass surrounding the lake. It's a shimmering blue with small fish leaping up every so often. The sun shines brightly and flowers my aunt arranged are beautiful. _

_I feel excitement build up in me, I breathe in the warm crisp air. Everything is breathtaking as Grant walks me down the aisle._

_But, that is nothing compared to the man I dance with now, at our reception by the lake. He holds me securely to him, my bare feet on top of his so I don't stumble through our first dance as husband and wife. _

_My dress is elegant but simple. It's strapless and floor length, running smoothly over my sunkissed skin. I have a white magnolia flower in my hair from where my husband plucked it from the flower arrangements. _

_My husband. My Zach. As always, he is breathtaking, but in the fourteen years I've known him, I've never seen him so heartbreakingly beautiful. I've never seen anyone so heartbreakingly beautiful. _

_At the ceremony he wore a black suit, his dark brown hair is disheveled and his soul green eyes convey so much love as we recite our vows. Now, his suit jacket has been disregarded, his white dress shirt is rolled up at the sleeves, and his black dress pants are rolled up to his knees from when he dragged me into the shallow water of the lake earlier. _

_Do I have to say how yummy that is?_

_We splashed at each other, forgetting about the small audience we had, snapping pictures away. We were so lost in each other, admiring one another as he held me close. We watched the sunset, knee-high in lake water, sharing a few chaste kisses and a few not-so-chaste kisses._

_Now, there are Christmas lights handing around us, circling the tent that we rented for the wedding reception. We danced slowly with each other, rocking back and forth as I stood on his bare feet. I lay my head against his chest as I play with the hair at the nape of his neck. His grip on my waist tightens. _

"_I love you, Hubby."_

"_Mmm, love you more, wifey," he chuckles. _

'_I want to know what Love is' by Foreigner comes on and we both laugh, remembering our karaoke days when we were snowed in at school. _

"_I guess this is our song, huh?" I giggle and blush as he kisses my nose, his hair falling over his eyes._

"_It's not a bad choice. Besides, you show me what love is. I've just never had heartache and pain," he smiles sheepishly. _

_I throw my head back and laugh, "You're so corny, but I agree. It's good we met each other so early, huh?" _

"_Mhmm, plus, how often does a guy get to say his wife let them have an 80's song by a soul singing white guy as their song? Your one in a billion, baby," he says, kissing my forehead as we continue to rock back and forth. _

"_Zach?" _

"_Hmm?" he looks down at me, his green eyes shining brilliantly. _

"_Kiss me," I whisper and his lips crash to mine. _

_I don't know how long we stand there under the clear, see through tent, kissing with the white twinkling Christmas around us. _

_He's all I can focus on. _

_As I pull away I whisper against his lips, "You're all mine now, Hubby."_

"_I've always been yours. Always will be," he says kissing the ring on my left hand, look at the engraving that reads 'Forever yours, my sweet'._

"_I didn't think it was very romantic to put Cookie so I just put 'sweet'," Zach smirks and I feel myself melting on the dance floor. I want him so bad._

"_It doesn't matter what you put, I'd love it either way. I'd love you anyways," I smile slyly. "I'm just glad you didn't put 'All my friends know the Low Rider."_

_We laugh at the That 70's show reference. _

"_I would never!" Zach fake gasps and I slap him playfully, rolling my eyes. _

"_I need to show you something," he says suddenly and turns us around so that I'm still standing on his feet, but my back is against his chest and we're facing away from the party._

"_You see Mrs. Cope's house?" Zach asks. _

"_Mhmm, a lot of good memories there, huh?" I ask with a slight blush remembering our first kiss. _

"_Exactly…" he says and I look back at him confused. _

"_What about it?" I ask._

"_In a couple of years, when Mrs. Cope moves to live with her daughter and grandkids, she's giving us the house, all paid off," he says kissing the spot just under my jaw that he _knows _makes me weak at the knees. And by that news I'm already challenging my klutziness. _

"_Ommygod, how-? What?" I ask turning to him with wide eyes. _

_He grins like a know-it-all and says, "She remembers that time in the seventh grade. Before you woke up that night, she said that if we ever grew to love each other and wanted to start a family, she would give us a wedding gift worthwhile. We finalized the deal a few weeks ago." _

"_Wow…" I shake my head, not knowing what to say, "That's amazing…this is amazing…you want to start a family with me?" I ask, biting my bottom lip and scrunching my nose-a bad habit. _

_He takes my bottom lip from under my teeth and kisses me. _

"_God, yes, Cammie. Maybe not until after we're done with college, but I can't imagine anything I want more," he said truthfully and I feel like I've fallen for him a little bit more; if possible._

"_How many kids?" I ask slyly. _

"_maybe three…or four…or five," he said with a grin._

_I suddenly felt lightheaded. _

"_We've got some work ahead of us, huh?" I ask coyly. _

_He grins back mischievously, his hands grabbing my backside. _

_I squeal in surprise as he laughs and kisses me with a new passion. _

"_We better get started." He says as we head for the limo and off to our honeymoon. _

I'm sorry, Zach, I think before the loss of blood gets to me and I fall unconscious.

* * *

><p><strong>A.N. Thanks for all your support! This is my second chapter this week! Consider it a birthday present...even though today is my birthday...but your REVIEWS would be lovely birthday presents, not to mention it would help me write faster! <strong>


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Seven**

**~Zachary Goode~**

**November 20, Monday**

They haven't located my wife or that fucker.

It's been two whole days since she contacted the police. It's been two days since my daughter has smiled up at me. Two days of unbearable pain that I haven't felt since they first told me, 'She's gone.'

Now that I know who has my wife…I can't…I can't function. It's worse now that I know that unstable son of a bitch has had her all these years.

I light up.

I take a long drag.

The smoke wafts around me.

"Zach."

It's like I can hear her just on the other side of the sliding glass, in the living room. She would play various melodies of whatever classical shit on the piano.

It was many of her hidden talents that made me fall even harder for my best friend.

God, did I fall hard.

"Zach."

"_Hey, Hubby…?" I hear her play Claire de Lune. _

_I'm on the porch just outside, going through the photo albums that my mother put together just before she passed away. _

_There were pictures of me and Cammie when we were in elementary school, jelly all over our faces from peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, us with floaters on our arms in the lake, Halloween pictures of Cammie in her Princess Belle dress, because that's her favorite Disney princess, and me with a purple shell bra and a fake green mermaid tail and a red wig; Ariel was _my _favorite Disney Princess. _

_There was a picture of us in the sixth grade when Cammie had to get her first pair of glasses-although she only wore them during class. There was one from eighth grade with me, Cammie, Bex, Grant, and some of the other neighborhood kids with silly string, raw cracked eggs, and TP rolls covering the abandoned house down the street-not to mention all over ourselves. I laughed at the memory of us losing control as we ended up spraying silly string and throwing eggs and TP rolls at each other instead of our annual raid at the abandoned house._

_I would pull Cammie into an embrace as she squealed against my egged shirt. I would kiss her, because I just couldn't keep my hands off of her. She's my personal drug and I'm completely addicted to everything about her. Her natural honey and strawberry scent, her silky dirty blond hair, big green eyes, and her kinky personality. The way her pink lips form a straight line and she crosses her arms when she's being stubborn, the way her nose scrunches and she bites her bottom lip when she's concentrating or nervous. Her obsession with chocolate chip cookies with the white macadamia nuts. _

_She's my entire life._

"_Yeah, love?" I ask as I step off the porch and into the living room where she's silently playing Debussy. _

"_I've written my own song…" she says quietly, a faint blush creeping up her neck. _

_I smile softly, even though she can't see me. her back is to me as she plays at the piano. _

"_It's more of a lullaby," she says as I walk the rest of the way and sit next to her on the piano bench, watching her fingers as they start to play a serene, beautiful piece. _

"_It's beautiful," I comment to her, truthfully. It really is on of the most beautiful lullabies I've heard. It switches from C Major to a soft A minor and back to G Major. It's soft and the notes flow together as she holds the right pedal down with her right foot. _

"_I wrote this piece, hoping that I could play it for the baby…" she's looking at me now, as her fingers still run across the keyboard. I don't know how she does that!_

_Wait…_

"_Wh-What baby?" I ask, anxious for the answer. _

_She stops playing now, turning on the bench to face me. "Our baby, Love," she grins, "We're pregnant!" _

_My eyes widen and I pull her all the way over to me so she's straddling my lap. _

"_Really! It's never worked before!" I say as she cups my face in her hands. _

"_I went to the doctor's today, I couldn't trust those damn sticks again after we tried so many times…I just had a feeling…that this time…" she trails off as a joyful tear runs down her cheek. _

"_Oh Babe!" I wipe her tear off and kiss her forehead, "We're gonna have a little munchkin!" I say and kiss her abdomen, right over her bellybutton. _

_She giggles in response, her nails raking against my scalp. _

_I continue to kiss and make farting noises on her tummy as she laughs. _

"_I love you, Zach."_

"_I love you too, Cookie. And our little munchkin."_

"ZACH!"

I'm snapped out of the memory as Grant yells at me from his porch next door. They inherited the Newman's house that was next door to the old resident, Mrs. Cope. We were all pretty supportive of becoming neighbors.

"What?" I ask to try and hide the tears I had before he could see.

Because, seriously. I don't want my best friend to see me like this. No one should see me like this.

I had to stay strong.

"I thought you quit smokin'," he says with a disapproving gaze.

"I did," I say, taking another drag.

The pain in my chest was subsiding, even if it was only a little bit. It wasn't as strong.

His nostrils flare as he crosses his arms and leans against his porch fence. We were only a few feet apart.

"I don't appreciate you smoking with my pregnant wife is around. I don't think your daughter would want to be a second hand smoker, either," he chastised.

I let out a guffaw and quickly became serious as I inhaled the cigarette, "I quit smoking when _my _wife was pregnant. I told her I would quit because I wouldn't want to endanger our 'soon-to-be big family'," I let out another fit of humorless laughs.

"But now look where I am, my daughter won't speak to me, my wife is missing and I'm just a worthless bastard who can't do anything to help my wife while a sadistic bastard is probably torturing her. and what am I doing? Sitting on my ass. Waiting for the damn government to find my wife along with the other 840,279-plus missing persons in the United States."

I put out my cigarette and rest my elbows on the fence, hands clasped together. I feel my whole damn body shaking and I can't stop it.

Breathe.

Inhale.

"Zach…you have to stop this. Killing yourself isn't going to bring Cammie back. And it sure isn't going to help your daughter. Think of MC. If anything happened to you she would have to grow up without either parent. You think that's what she wants? If they can't find Cammie you need to-"

"SHE'S GOING TO COME BACK, DAMNIT!" I yelled, making Grant's dog, Pudding, start to bark.

Grant opened his mouth to say something when tiny footsteps drummed against the porch.

"Daddy, I'm going to be late to school," my little girl yawned and wrapped her little arms around my leg.

Grant's eyes met mine for a moment before he walked back inside his house.

"Here, baby girl, let's get you ready," I picked her up and walked with her in my arms to her room.

I brought her into the bathroom first so she could 'go' and brush her teeth and her long hair.

Her eyes were still full with sleep as I dressed her in a long sleeved shirt, thermal pants, long knee-high socks, snow jacket, and snow boots.

_She's just like you, Cookie. Never was a morning person._

"You forgot something, Daddy," she says in her sleepy haze.

I smile, or at least I try to, because I haven't forgotten.

I put her blue ski hat on; along with one of Cammie's old scarfs that Rachel gave me. I swallowed hard as I remembered Cammie wearing the same scarf for years until she was twelve.

"I haven't forgotten, Munchkin," I say as I place my bundled up little girl on the edge of her princess bed.

I pick up her bunny necklace and clasp it around her neck so the little charm hung over her blue scarf.

I smooth down her hair as she yawns once more. I could understand why she would still be tired, since it's still very gloomy outside. Winter was definitely here.

"Daddy?" she asks quietly.

"Yeah, baby?" I ask still kneeling in front of her.

"You love me, right?" she asks and my heart aches. I can see tears in welling up in her beautiful green eyes.

How could she not know-not think-that I love her? She and Cammie are all that I have.

Half of me is missing.

"Of course I love you Macey. Why would you ask that?" I ask.

"Because…I thought you di'nt love me…cause you yell at me, but I sowwy, Daddy. I di'nt mean to m-make you angwy," I pick her up and sit on her bed with her in my lap.

_I've failed you Cookie._

"Oh, baby, you didn't make me angry. I just want you to know that your mom does love you," I say rocking her back and forth.

"But she don't know m-me. How could s-she love me?" MC asks. I can feel her body shaking.

_How do I explain this, baby?_

"She's known you since the day you were born. She will always love you," I say softly.

She nods but I know she doesn't completely understand. How else could I say 'hello daughter, your mommy isn't here because her childhood stalker has her held captive for the past seven years. But, oh yeah, she loves you.'

Not the most ideal father/daughter conversation.

"Let's get you to school. Munchkin," I adjust her ski hat and hold her hand as we descend the stairs and grab her princess backpack.

We both walk down the porch and I tuck her into the booster seat of my Mazda 2011.

She buckles herself saying, "I gottit Daddy! I gots it!" and waves her hand in my face as if to shoo me away.

_Just as independent as you, Angel. _

That thought causes my smile to falter.

I get behind the wheel and pull away and we drive in silence.

Inhale.

Exhale.

We pull up to her elementary school and I walk her towards her first grade class.

More silence.

"Good morning, MC, Zach," MC's teacher, Liz, my cousin Jonas' wife, greets us.

"Hey, Liz," I wave and bend down to MC.

"Have a good day, Munchkin. I'll pick you up when you get out," I say and she nods.

"Bye, Daddy," she smiles and kisses my cheek before running off inside the classroom.

I stand up again with a sigh as I watch my little angel playing with her friends.

"You know there's another storm coming, so we might have to lock down the school," Liz says.

I shrug and stuff my hands in my jacket pockets. "I'll come as soon as I can."

Liz sighs and says, "Zach, don't give up on Cammie. I know you won't, but no matter what, you know she loves you. If they find her or not, you have to be there for MC. She needs you."

I smile at my cousin's wife because I know she means well. If it was anybody else I would've already flashed them a certain finger.

Plus there was the fact that this was an elementary school.

"I know, Liz. I just don't want her to grow up without her mom," I rake my hands through my hair, "You don't know what it's like to have your daughter not love her own mother. It's so fu-fudging messed up and I can't do shi-shizz about it."

Liz just squeezes my shoulder, "I can't begin to imagine, Zach. If you ever need anything, just call me and Jonas," she says and I feel a little better knowing my family would do anything for my little angel and me.

That sounds like some kind of boutique or something; my little angel and me.

Huh.

After my little epiphany I had already gotten into my car and had driven home.

When I got in, the phone was already singing.

"Hello?" I ask, answering the phone.

"Hello, Zach," I hear Rachel, Cammie's mom greet me on the phone.

"Oh, hi Rachel," I say with a sigh. I don't really want to talk to her right now. All I want to do is sleep since I don't have any clients to work with today.

"Look, Zach, would it be okay if I came over this weekend? I would really like to talk to you and visit MC," she says and I know she's full of bull shit cause' I know all she wants to talk about is custody over MC. I can't deal with that shit right now.

"Yeah, sure, whatever," I sigh.

I was about to hang up when she adds: "This is your last chance to prove that you're a stable father. I've known you since you were little, Zach, but I can't have my granddaughter neglected while you deal with your own problems. You understand, right?"

Fuck you.

"Yeah. I'll see you this weekend," I hang up and crawl my way upstairs and fall asleep on my bed, surrounding myself in memories as I hold Cammie's pillow to my face.

_Ring. Ring. Ring._

Inhale.

Exhale.

_Ring. Ring. Ring. _

Inhale.

Pain. Pain. Pain.

Exhale.

_Ring. Ring. Ring._

I crack open my eyes and pick up the phone, disregarding the fact that MC is almost ready to be picked up. Or the fact that there's another blizzard outside.

"Hello?"

"Mr. Goode?"

My heart clenches, is it the FBI?

"Yes?"

"It's Cherrytop Elementary School."

I was expecting this.

"Oh, are they having an extended day because of the blizzard?" I ask.

"Well…yes, but that's not why we've called."

I'm confused and the worst possibilities come to mind.

"You see, after lunch, the storm started and they called in all children…"

No.

Hell no.

"But your daughter…"

Oh, God.

Pain. Pain. Pain.

"She's gone missing."

* * *

><p><strong>A.N. So, I love Arizona. I do. And I love vaycay cause I get to hang out during the day and relax by the fire in the hotel room and just write. Anyways, I know I said I might do the M rated thing in this chapter or the last but I just felt it wasn't really necessary for those chapters. I might do it later but there's only a slight chance. Sorry if this doesn't please you or whatever.<strong>

**PM me if you have ANY questions! Oh, and REVIEW!**

**~Akira**


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter Eight**

**~Cammie Morgan~**

**November 20, 2011**

Everything was…cold. There was still a black bag covering my head. My legs felt numb from being tied up for two days in the back of the van.

Sometimes he would leave me here alone. Of course, I was locked up in a small, dark room. Sometimes I could hear voices. I could hear Luther, but I could hear other voices too. They were gruff and vile with every word the muttered.

At times I would eavesdrop. Sometimes they would talk about me.

They would offer to violate me…sometimes he would comply, other times he would refuse calmly, sometimes I could hear gunshots.

But this place was new…it was familiar…but I don't recall being here in the past seven years.

I felt around with my snarled hands to be met with cold, cement floor.

A shiver went down my spine as another gust of traveled into the secured room.

There were probably cracks in the walls.

I tried to stand to search for those cracks, but ever since my attempted escape two however many days ago, I've been abused to the point where I can no longer walk.

And even then, I could barely walk.

I sat in silence, my breathing becoming shallow. I felt hot, but the cold wind blew my hair to the side, down my neck, trailing goosebumps on my skin through the light shirt and sweat pants.

I thought of what I usually thought of when I was alone-which was often enough-Zach.

I often thought about what he could be doing right at this moment.

When I was escaping towards the Safeway, I caught a glimpse of the newspaper rack. The photographic memory that I acquired during my years of training at the Federal Bureau allowed me to catch a glimpse of the date.

November.

_It's almost Thanksgiving, baby._

I think of my hansome, sexy, husband sitting at our dinning room table with a seven year old MC. I was there as well. There was the Thanksgiving essentials: turkey, gravy, potatoes, corn, cranberry sauce, etc.

My mouth started to water at the memory of such foods.

But then I disappeared from the table.

Zach was there with MC, all of the food burnt to a crisp because, face it babe, you can't cook.

But then a woman appeared.

She was smiling lovingly at you, baby. MC held her hand and said, "Thank you, Mama."

The delicious food reappeared and the three of you laughed and ate together.

Saying Grace as a family.

I see you mutter an "I love you," to the woman at your side and she offers the same.

You bring her hand up to kiss it and I see a glistening ring on her left hand.

Tears stream down my face. The wind blows harder, making my wet face flush.

My empty stomach churns and I bend over to throw up.

When I'm done I sob louder.

_I can't get through this without you, baby. _I think to myself.

But those images were too vivid. Too real.

Flashbacks of Luther in the eighth grade flood through my mind.

The pictures of me in his locker.

Luther rounding every corner I would turn.

Luther trying to drag me into a janitor's closet…

That day in seventh grade when he wanted to ditch school with me…my refusal and the fist that connected with my forehead, making my head fall back onto a mailbox…then waking up to Zach.

In ninth grade was the final straw.

He had cornered me in the bathroom and through me against the mirror, cracking it against my head. My head bled as he threw me to the ground.

I blacked out at that point, but woke up to Zach in the hospital.

_You were always my guardian. You were always there._

I filed a restraining order. Luther was expelled and sent to a boarding school.

I never saw him again…until December of 2004.

My weeps covered the silence again as I refused the memory.

I had come to terms with myself already. I would never return to Boston, Illinois. I would never see my husband or MC again. We would never grow old together. We would never get to retire together or save money to travel Europe. I would never see MC grow up, hear her first words, see her take her first steps, take her on her first day of school, talk to her about what kinds of friends she should look for, what kind of boy was worthy of her, see her walk down an aisle on her father's arm, eventually have grandchildren…

Never.

.

.

.

Muffled cries came from the other side of the door. Voices talked in hushed tones, but they weren't cruel or vile.

It certainly wasn't Luther.

One was deep and…soothingly familiar.

The other was high pitched and filled with remorse.

"H-Help!" I attempted to yell but it came out hoarse and covered by the roaring winds.

"He-h-h-HEL-h-h-help!" I cried but I knew they couldn't hear.

I tried lifting my arms and legs just high enough and letting them fall, hoping to make enough noise to alert who ever it was.

"What was that?" what I assumed was a small child asked.

"Probably just mice…I remember your mom acting fearless when we saw mice in here. But you could tell how terrified she really was," a struggled laugh came through the door and I immediately recognized it.

Zach?

"Zach?" I yelled but again it was like a whisper. I flailed my limp arms and legs around. "Z-ZACH!"

I heard a scream and that laugh.

_Your laugh, baby._

I struggled with all of my might, tears streaming faster in desperation.

_You're so close…_

"Let's get you home…" you say…

"N-N-NO!" I cry and bang my bundled fists against the cement wall of the basement I was locked up in.

"HURRY DADDY! It's SCARY! FASTER DADDY! WHY ARE YOU WALKING SO SLOW!"

MC..

Is that MC?

My baby?

Then I realize…

Those are the first words I've ever heard her say.

It makes want to laugh and cry at the same time.

A door slammed close and it felt like my heart shattered into bits and pieces.

They were so close…my family…

That's when I realized I couldn't give up. They were all I had and after seven years…seven fucking years…of not hearing his voice, and missing her first words, I needed them more than I ever did before.

_They seem so far away now…_

I thought but remembered where I was.

_Maybe not so far away…_

* * *

><p><strong>A.N. Sorry for the shortness of this chapter but I just wanted to get this out there. <strong>

**So, who wants to slap Zach? Who's dying with the irony of it all? **

**They were so close, yet so far. **

**Oh goodness.**

**Tell me your thoughts! **

**~Akira**


	9. IMPORTANT AN!

**Sorry this is not a chapter. **

**Please, take the poll on my profile if you _want _this to be a chapter!**

**Sorry that I'm doing this but I would like to know what you guys want to read the most. Since school is starting again, it will be hard for me to update everything.**

**Thanks for your support and patience with me!**

**~Akira**


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter Nine**

**~Zachary Goode~**

**November 20**

**Part Two**

* * *

><p><em>I'm confused and the worst possibilities come to mind.<em>

_"You see, after lunch, the storm started and they called in all children…"_

_No._

_Hell no._

_"But your daughter…"_

_Oh, God._

_Pain. Pain. Pain._

_"She's gone missing."_

I grabbed at my chest. Right at where my heart should be.

I'm broken, falling. A red haze blurs my vision.

I back up against the thick glass doors of the living room, letting its freezing touch run up my spine, numbing my mind.

"Mr. Goode?"

I slide down the glass doors and I can feel my heart racing despite how broken it feels.

"I'm sorry Mr. Goode, we have already notified the police. They can't send out anybody during the storm…"

"WHAT ABOUT MY SEVEN YEAR OLD DAUGHTER, HUH? SHE'S PROBABLY FREEZING OU-OUT THERE…and it's your fault for not keeping an eye her…ho-how c-could you not realize that she w-wasn't there!" I couldn't tell if I was stuttering because of the freezing glass door or because of the raging sobs that broke through me.

I assumed both.

I hate damn government officials. Even elementary school principals.

I rendered the man speechless as he said in a doubtful tone, "She'll be okay, Mr. Goode. I'm so very sorry."

"How could she be fucking fine? She's scared of the fucking voices and monsters coming from her closet! And d-don't say you're f-fu…sorry, because if you were, you would be off your ass and looking for her!"

"Mr. Goode-"

I threw the phone at the wall and watched as it shattered into thousands of pieces

I pushed myself up and my knees threatened to buckle forward. I stumbled forward, towards the closet, grabbing my sweater and snow jacket as well as MC's other snow jacket.

Hypothermia, frost bite, pneumonia…death…

All of the possibilities of the fate my angel, my life, would receive made me pause on the porch. The wind and snow whipped at my face and my stomach churned inside me and I bent over to hurl on the white snow.

_Damn. _

_Damn damn damn._

I trudged warily through the storm, my feet dragging behind me as if it weighed a ton. The wind blew like bullets at my body, making my face flush. It got harder and harder to breathe in oxygen but I couldn't think of myself right now.

The situation was eerily familiar, as I called out MC's name frantically.

My little girl entered my thoughts. If I lost her…where would that leave me? My two favorite girls both gone…I wouldn't live. Simple as that. I just wouldn't. there would be no more morning cartoons of Rugrats or Dora the Explorer. No more tickle fights that would ensue me giving into her beautiful eyes. No more cooking her mother's favorite macadamia chocolate chip cookies. No more telling her stories of Cammie when she couldn't fall asleep because of the storms outside or the monsters in her closet. No more getting a stiff neck and aching back from sleeping in her small princess bed when she didn't want me to leave at night.

"MC!" I called desperately because I couldn't live without those things. I couldn't bare having another part of my life ripped from me. whatever higher power that looked down on me must have felt pretty damned good at that moment because my life was Hell.

How many times would I have to answer a phone call to have the knife that pierced my heart seven years ago twist and turn to intensify the pain.

_So much pain, Cookie. _

And as I trudged down the snow-no longer able to tell the difference between the streets and sidewalks-I realized right then where the familiarity of the situation aroused.

Because right there in the snow was that blue scarf that went with that blue coat that Cammie wore that day in seventh grade. The day Cammie had that encounter with her future stalker. Her future kidnapper.

"_Promise you won't tell anyone about Luther, Zach?" Cammie had asked the next morning after Mrs. Cope made us breakfast. _

"_Why? He hurt you Cam!" I said squeezing our entwined hands tighter, proving to myself that she was here with me. She _was _here with _me_._

"_Because it's not a big deal…" she said with a sigh, "I'm sure he didn't mean it…Besides, you'll protect me now, right?" she bit her lower lip._

"_Always," I grinned thinking smugly, 'yeah, seventh graders can be romantic', "I'll always protect you Cammie."_

_She stood on her tip toes and kissed my nose, giggling when I held her hips and pulled her closer so I could look her in the eyes._

"_When I said that we should ever stop…that wasn't a suggestion-" but before I could finish, her mouth captured mine and even the eerie, cold breeze wouldn't be able to stop us. Not ever._

"MC!" I yelled, blue scarf in hand as I looked around and my jaw fell slack as I realized where I was standing. That right in front of me was the abandoned house that served as our getaway as kids.

So many memories.

"MC!" I yelled as I saw the worn down front door ajar.

I ran up the creaky stairs, one of them giving way under my foot, splinters jabbing into my ankle.

"Shit!" I cried out until little fingers wrapped around my arm and the sweetest voice whispered through the freezing wind.

"Daddy?"

a wave of relief washed over me as I saw MC, in one piece, standing before me with a look so frightened. I forgot about my bloody ankle as I scooped my daughter into my arms and sobs racked through me.

"MC! What were you thinking? Why did you come here, baby! You know you're not allowed to run from school!" I scolded although my heart wasn't really in it as I reveled the feeling of my Munchkin in my arms.

"I'm sorry Daddy…" she said locking her ankles around my torso and her hands around my neck.

"I was so worried, baby," I kissed her little cheek when I noticed her little tears.

"I saw this house in the picture wif Mommy and I saw it out the window when you drive me to school," she says, muffled by the collar of my jacket.

My chest constricted painfully as I asked, "Why did you want to come here, Munchkin?"

She squeezes me tighter as she answers warily, "I thought Mommy might be hiding here and I could come see her," she says pulling back to look at me now and knit her eyebrows together and scrunched up her nose as she bit her lip, "But I was too scared to go inside."

I sigh with relief that she hasn't been inside. Who knows what kind of crap we left in there the last time all of us were in there?

"How about we go inside while we wait for the blizzard to pass?" I ask and she nods.

Once we're inside, I look at all of the plastic covered furniture in the old living room where Grant, Jonas, Bex, and I all used to sit around and play poker while Macey and Liz dragged Cammie to the mall. The hidden space under the staircase-that was merely a hole in the wall next to the door to the basement-where Cam and I usually made-out like horny teens.

Well, we were, at the time.

I smiled at that memory. I was thirty-fucking-years old and I still thought about necking my missing wife like a teen going through puberty.

I'm one sick bastard.

"Mommy?" MC held onto my leg and looked around the house curiously. My breathing became erratic as she continued to call for her Mommy.

But I knew she would never answer back.

"MC, want me to tell you a story?" I asked my munchkin while I sat on one of the steps of the stairs, gazing at that space under the stairs where we used to sit for hours, just talking and kissing. Just to be with each other.

"Kay, Daddy," MC crawled onto my lap and leaned her head over my heart. I automatically wrapped my arms around her small frame and thought about how I should start this out.

"One day, your Mommy and Daddy were at the lake with your Uncles and Aunts, well except Uncle Nick, and your Mommy did something mean to Daddy," I pretended to growl.

MC's eyes went wide and her mouth formed an 'o' as she asked, "What'd she do, Daddy?"

"She pushed Daddy into the lake without swim clothes on," I scowled.

MC just laughed and said, "Tha's not mean! Tha's funny Daddy!"

I tickled her for a second before I continued, "Your Mommy and Aunts said that they were tougher than Daddy and your Uncle, so one day when we all came here, your Mommy bought silly string and eggs and toilet paper to throw at all of us. But Daddy and Uncle Grant stole some of that stuff so we could throw some of it back at them."

"Was Mommy mad?" she asked.

I laughed and shook my head, "Sort of. But she was so happy, MC, she smiled a lot and laughed with Daddy."

MC smiled like she was hearing the best story ever. I sound liken a broken record in my head, but…she's so beautiful, Cookie. She's all you.

"It was the first day I told Mommy that I love her," MC broken out in a heartbreakingly beautiful smile. That same smile.

_THUMP. THUMP._

"What was that?" MC wrapped herself around me again and I couldn't help but belt out a laugh.

"Probably just mice…I remember your mom acting fearless when we saw mice in here. But you could tell how terrified she really was," I let out another strangled laugh as memories assaulted my mind.

It's too much.

THUMP. THUMP.

"AGGHHH!" MC screams and I shake with laughter. "I hate mice!" MC says and basically cuts off my circulation.

I listen for the blizzard but sigh with relief when I no longer here anything but the eerie silence.

Just like that day.

"Let's get you home," I say as she snuggles closer to me, yawning.

THUMP. THUMP.

MC screams again and I take my time to look around one last time, drinking up every memory of this abandoned house.

"HURRY DADDY! It's SCARY! FASTER DADDY! WHY ARE YOU WALKING SO SLOW!"

I laugh when I realize what I'm doing and rub her back soothingly, "Okay, okay, baby. "

I close the door behind us and MC says quietly, "Mommy wasn't there…"

"I'm sorry, MC…" I hold her closer and I feel her watching the abandoned house closely as I walk down the street to our house.

I was too focused to see the van.

* * *

><p><strong>A.N. Thanks for being patient. Review?<strong>

**Yes, I changed my penname, although this is clearly still:**

**~Akira**


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter Eleven**

**~Macey Cameron Goode~**

**November 21, 2011**

* * *

><p>Daddy was in his office. He had two desks in there but I don't know why he needs only needs one.<p>

I also don't understand why he needs two pillows. I only use one and he only sleeps on one side of his bed. Cousin Matt who is a year younger than me says that Aunt Macey and Uncle Nick sleep in the same bed and that's why there are two pillows.

I thought Daddy would be so, so mad when he found me at that old house, but he said he was more scared than angry. He also said he loves me, so I shouldn't worry too much. But, now I am so sad.

I'm sitting in the living room, on the piano bench because Daddy says it's his favorite place in the whole house. I don't know why, though, because whenever I see him sit here, he cries. He doesn't know I can see him when he cries, but I do.

I think it's because my Mommy left us.

I've never met my Mommy. Daddy say I could fit in his arm, I was so small, when Mommy left.

I also don't know why we have the piano, because no one in my family knows how.

Earlier at school today, my best friend Eddie-well, his real name is Edward, but all the mean kids call him Ed-wart because they think his name is an old man's name, so I call him Eddie. Eddie is a great drawer, that's how we became friends. Eddie told me that my Mommy was probably just hiding.

That's why I'm so sad, because Mommy wasn't there.

I wandered over to the small table next to the couch and picked up the heavy book that's almost bigger than me, and sat down at the piano bench. My long hair always get caught under my butt when I sit down now, it's so long. I've never had a hair cut before. Daddy says he won't ever cut my hair but I love it when Grandma braids it.

My Daddy's shown me this book so many times before. He likes to point out where my Mommy is in every picture. He would rub his finger over her face to get the dusties off, he says, but he even does it when there's no dusties.

I don't get Daddy sometimes.

Eddie's Daddy is an artist. Eddie doesn't get his Daddy sometimes either.

I turned the pages until I saw my favorite picture of my Mommy. She and Daddy were holding hands and smiling really big at each other. They were looking at each other and they're feet were in the water of the lake. I knew it was the lake outside. Daddy takes me there a lot.

My Momma looks so pretty…Daddy says so. She has the same hair I do, and Daddy says we have the same nose. He says that everything is exactly like Mommy cept' for my green eyes. They're like Daddy's.

I turn the page and see Mommy and Daddy dancing. I see pictures of Mommy with a really big tummy. Daddy says that It was because I was inside her tummy. It confused me because Daddy told me that babies grow from flowers.

I turn the page again and I see the picture of Mommy and Daddy at the old house. Mommy looks happiest there. Daddy said he told Mommy that he loved her then.

But it makes me so sad that she wasn't there yesterday. That I didn't see her.

But Daddy say she is happiest there so she has to be! And Eddie say she was jus' hidin.

So's that's why I went to the closet by the front door and grabbed my blue jacket with Princess Jasmine on it. Princess Jasmine is the best! Eddie say Princess MC is the best.

Silly boys.

I also get my blue scarf and hat. I start to open the door when I run back to the living room and grab the picture book. I take out the picture of Mommy and Daddy on the lake and put it in my pocket.

I open the door slowly so's it doesn't make those scary noises. I don't want Daddy to know. He only say that Mommy's'not there.

I know she is.

She's jus' hiding. Like Eddie says.

It's cold outside and the snow is very deep.

But I know that the old house is just down the street. So's when I got there I tried to open the front door, but it was locked. It wasn't locked yesterday. So's I tried what I do when Uncle Grant's house is locked.

I walk to the side of the house to see if there was a small window like the one at Uncle Grant's.

There was.

It was already open so I put my feet in first. The window always took me to Uncle Grant's basement, so's I knew this was probably a basement too.

Basements are scary.

Just like the monsters in my closet. Or the ones under my bed!

So's, I dropped down and my boots made a loud noise. It was dark in the basement so I couldn't see anythin.

I heard something move. I got scared.

So's that's why I screamed, "MOMMY!"

.

.

.

"Ughmenuh," a scratchy voice came from right next to me and my eyes widened.

"Mommy! Is that you?" I asked in a whisper. Just in case it wasn't my Mommy.

I hear more noises until I see a lady move into the light of the window.

.

.

.

But she doesn't look like Mommy.

Her eyes are closed. Her hair looks kinda like Mommy's but it all tangled and dirty lookin. And the lady is skinny. Real skinny. She must've been wrappin present or somethin cause she was all tangled in this rope. Daddy always gets tangled in strings when he tries to wrap presents. She must've been wrappin presents.

"Lady? Do you know where my Mommy is?" I ask in my nicest voice.

She opens her eyes.

"M-Mommy?"

A door slams open.

"Mommy? Now Cammie, don't tell me you've been unfaithful!"

I'm suddenly grabbed off the floor and I see his scary eyes and yellow teeth.

"Now…What to do with you?"

* * *

><p><strong>A.N. Yes, it's very short but I'm planning on updating sometime this weekend depending on how many reviews I get.<strong>

**10 reviews-one week**

**15 reviews-five days**

**20 reviews-three days**

**25 reviews-two days**

**30 reviews-one day**

**So, Review please!**

**What's gonna happen to MC? Where's Zach? Can Cammie pull through?**

**Leave comments!**

**~Akira**


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter Twelve**

**~Zach Goode~**

**~January 21, Earlier that Day~**

"Agent Solomon."

I had just got MC in her warm jammies by the fire after letting her sleep for hours into the late afternoon. She conked out so fast once we were home. I was worried at first that she might have hypothermia or pneumonia or somethin'. But she wasn't running a fever and she wasn't wheezing so I decided to wait and see, and if she got sick I would take her to the hospital.

_Yeah, I know the drill. I read all of those baby and parenting books that you gave me, Cookie._

"Did you find her?" I seethed through the phone. Damn, I hate the government. My wife was an agent, just like Solomon, but they gave up on her. Tried to pronounce her as dead but…no. She's not dead….not until I see the proof.

Not even then.

"_Hey Spock!" Cammie held up her hand, index and middle finger pressed together like her ring finger and pinky, "Tell Scotty to beam us outta here!" _

"_Gotcha Captain Kirk!" I turned about face to face Grant. "beam me up Scotty!"_

"_I'm never letting you and Cammie choose the Halloween costumes again…" Grant rolled his eyes, "Were TEN for chrissakes, not fifty! We weren't born in the 1940's!"_

"_Star Trek was in the 1960's dumbass!" I chuckle at my best friend._

"_Hey! No cussin' Zach!" Jonas says and turns to Grant, "At least you knew that fifty year olds these days were born in the 40's man, that's progress!"_

_Grant punches Jonas in the arm, "Nerd. Come on, Mr. Sulu, I can take ya down!"_

_Cammie comes back with a bag full of Halloween cookies-little pumpkins and ghosts with glitter sprinkled all over. She wore her yellow Star Trek shirt and a black skirt since her mom said that she was a girl, not a boy. _

_Whatever, Cammie would look pretty either way. Cammie's always pretty._

"_Come on Zach! Let's go to that next house!" she grabs my hand and we run from the other guys. Grant and Jonas and Bex, Liz, and Macey are all apart of our close circle of best friends, sure. _

_But, no one knows me like Cammie does. No one comes close to being as close as Cammie is to me. My dad died when I was really young and Cammie's dad died three years ago. We were there for each other. She understands. I was scared to move to Boston from our small town in Colorado, but now looking back, I wouldn't want to be anywhere else._

"_Come on slow poke!" she squeezes my hand harder and I try not to spill my bag of candy, "Do I have to drag you the whole way?"_

"_Where're we goin' Cookie?" I ask and she blushes. She always blushes when I call her that. I don't know why. _

_Girls._

"_This haunted house that some high schoolers made at that house down the street from Mrs. Copes!" Cammie says into my ear cause were about the same height now. _

_I wish I were taller. I will be taller._

"_I thought you hated Haunted Houses…you always get scared and cry, right?" I ask her with a cocked brow. I know my best friend._

"_Yeah," she says warily and stops for a minute to look at me, never dropping our hands, "But you'll come inside with me, right?"_

"_Course, Camz," I say and ruffle her hair with my free hand. _

_She gives me that look that's supposed to look angry but she just looks like a little kitten. Kitten Cammie. Albeit an angry kitten. Nah, I'll stick to Cookie._

_But then she smiles again and pulls me along, "C'mon Spock, we got a Haunted House to get to!" _

_I laugh at her enthusiasm and follow along, letting her drag me._

_We get to that abandoned house that got sorta wrecked when we had that really big storm a year ago._

_There was a line and a bunch of fake bodies and gravestones in the yard and fake blood on sheets that hung from a dry wire. It all looked pretty corny but I could feel Cammie trembling beside me. _

"_How old ae' ya kids?" this guy that looked about sixteen asked us in a very thick Bostonian accent. _

"_Ten," me and Cookie said in unison and the guy clicked his tongue._

"_A'light, I'll let ya in, just don't go cryin' to yer mommies that it was to scary," the pimply sixteen year old looked scarier than the cheap Halloween decorations. _

_I told that to Cammie as we entered the house and she laughed, relaxing a bit. _

_We went to the living room where they had a little maze where these high schoolers dressed like zombies and rattled these cans as they jumped out at us. Cammie would jump ten feet in the air and squeeze the hell outta my neck. But I didn't care much, I just kinda rubbed her back or squeezed her hand. _

_We were led to the kitchen next, one of the guys dressed like a mad scientist or somethin', doing an operation with fake rubber rats and UV lights flashing, and Halloween music. It was all very corny._

_There would be different monsters popping out of closets and corner trying to scare Cookie and me, but I just laughed at em which made Cookie relax more. She only screamed a couple times, so far, but clung to my neck the whole time._

_The last part of the maze was to go down to the basement. It was so dark that you couldn't see a damned thing. Nothin' at all. Fake flashes of lightning would light up the room every few seconds, and I gotta say it looked pretty realistic. A whole group of kids in every grade from the neighborhood was packed in the basement. We were all so quiet that we could hear the door to the basement creaking…then click in place. _

"_Z-Zach?" Cammie asked beside me._

"_I'm right here, Cookie," I told her, outing an arm around her now so she would know I was there._

"_I'm scared," she said and I felt so bad cause she sounded like she was about to cry, "What're they gonna do-"_

_THUMP!_

_All of a sudden this guy with a bloody ax and a mask jump outta the small window just when the fake lightning flashed. Everyone started screaming and running around. Everybody was knocking into us. And all of a sudden Cammie wasn't in my arms anymore, her hand wasn't in mine. _

_She never did let go._

"_CAMMIE?" I yell, but I couldn't see a damned thing! "CAM!"_

_then this guy opened this secret door or something behind a tool shelf that led us all outside so that they could bring in the next group. I went out, looking for Cammie in the moonlit darkness._

"_Cammie?" I ask, looking through the crowd._

_I couldn't see her though. _

_I looked and looked and searched everywhere outside but she wasn't there._

_I went back to the side and saw the pimply teen standing next to the window, laughing as the next group saw the ax murderer and started to scream. _

"_Hey!" I yelled and turned him around. "I need to get in there!" _

_He looked at me like I was crazy or something. _

"_Sorry kid, can't go in more than once-"_

"_My best friend is still in there, and she's probably scared to death!" I yell and point to that secret door, "Ya better let me get in there and get her or else."_

_He laughs and says, "Jeez, hold your horses man, wait until I havta open the door, a'light?" _

"_No," I say and his damn smirk falls, "Let me in. now, ya bastard." _

"_What're ya, ten? What's you're momma gonna say when she knows ya been cussin? Ya Daddy gonna spank ya kid, that's what my dad did." _

"_My Dad is dead, son of a bitch, so I'll cuss whenever I want, ya hear? Now open that damn door!" he looks momentarily stunned before opening that secret door. _

_Once he opened it, and the faintest of moonlight filtered through, I told him, "Leave that door open so I can look for her."_

_He nodded and I walked through, looking all over the room. _

"_Cammie? Cookie?" I yelled, looking all over that huge basement. _

_I started to become panicked when I heard a sniffle, "Zach!" _

_And there was Cookie, sitting in a fetal position with tears streaming down her face and oil grease all over her yellow Star Trek shirt. Her candy and Halloween cookies scattered across the floor. _

_I ran over and gathered her in my arms and held her just like I did when her dad died. _

"_I'm here, Cookie. It's alright now, yeah," I soothed and started to pick up her candy and put them all in her bag while I still held her. She cried into my neck until she started to calm down. _

"_I was so scared cause I couldn't find you," she sobbed and I ruffled her hair a bit._

"_It's okay now, Cookie. I'm here. I found you," I say and kiss her forehead cause it always calms her down. _

"_Thank you, Zach…" she smiles warily up at me and it makes me smile too cause I love seeing her happy. _

"_Anytime, Cookie," I say and it's a promise because I will always be there for her. Like she's always been there for me._

_And when the pimply teenager came and told us to scram, we walked back home, and she held my hand. _

_She never really let go._

"No, Mr. Goode, but we have a lead on Luther's whereabouts," Agent Solomon said in answer to my question and hope was evident in his tone.

When I was too lost in thought to answer, he continued, "It seems that Luther has been spotted by locals in the past decade in Minnesota, Arizona, Boston, New York, and LA with a group of gang members that the FBI have been trying to nail. There have been suspicions of them drug dealing…"

"Yeah, what does this have to do with Luther? So he's and addict?" I shrug, waiting for the catch.

But then the thought occurs to me that he's injected Cammie with drugs. And once he drugged her he would….

Oh, god. No. Please…No…

"Not only is he an addict, Zach, but we believe he sells all kinds of illegal substances. I guess you could call him…the leader…a drug dealer," Agent Solomon says with a sigh, clearly thinking the same things I am.

"We've tracked some of the people from his best dealers and there is talk of a meeting being held in Boston where the group originated."

I leaned forward in my desk, hand gripping my cell.

"They could be coming here? They could be here in Boston?" I ask in anticipation.

"Assuming that he brings her wherever he goes, then yes, it's very likely…" he says.

I felt like there was more on his mind, he was just trying to see how I would take it. And I had a pretty good idea of what that was.

"Yes, Cameron has as restraining order on Luther Finnigan. Ever since 1995, she's had a restraining order against him for…assault…"

I hear the Agent 'hmm' in thought before he said, "The files don't really specify what happened those sixteen years ago…"

"He..tried to make advances on her," I said, my chest tightening with the memory. It just hurt so much to know that he had her now but he could have gotten her so much sooner…it's just…so painful to know…God, please tell me you're okay, Love.

"Advances meaning…?" what was he trying to do? Make me come out and say exactly what that bastard try to do to my wife?

"He…tried to take advantage…"

"Take advantage…?"

_It kills me, Cookie._

"He tried to fucking rape my wife!" I yell into the phone and silent sobs rack through me, cutting and twisting until I'm drowning. And I'm glad that he can't see me through the phone because I've let too many people see my weakness. My instability.

Maybe my mother-in-law was right…

"There is one more thing, Mr. Goode…" Agent Solomon says and I hear a shuffling of papers in the background. "Do you know what a bug is? I mean, in the surveillance world?"

"My wife trained and studied to be a trained surveillance field agent, sir, I think I would know."

I rolled my eyes, not really feeling bad for snapping at him out of frustration.

"Yes, well, we were able to bug one of his dealers, a Sebastian Clove. He met with Luther at a pub in Downtown Boston earlier this evening…they referred to an 'Annie' and how he knew she had been unfaithful since he's been away…for sixteen years…that she often talks in her sleep about, and I quote him: "Another lover named Zach."

My heart lurched in my chest and the tears pooled around my eyes. Damn, I was getting so worked up. I grabbed the cigarettes out of my desk drawer and lit up.

Taking a long drag, I replied, "That's…That's Cammie."

My eyes burned and I remembered why I never smoked inside.

But I needed to calm the Hell down.

_We'll figure this out, Cookie._

"Luther talks to him, saying he's going to find…" I hear more rustling of papers and I want to yell at him to get on with it, "…Zach, and make him pay…for seducing his wife."

Black, pure, irrepressible rage surged through me, consuming me.

"His _wife_?" I gritted my teeth and slammed my desk with hard fists until multiple cracks scarred the glazed wood, "HIS WIFE?"

"He knows that it's you, Zach, he talked about his childhood and how you imprisoned his lover from him. I suspect the reason he's holding the meeting in Boston is to…get rid of you once and for all."

I stumbled back into my chair. I didn't even realize I was standing.

All I could think about was MC…she's in danger here. If he's coming after me…Mc is at risk…it doesn't matter that part of her is from Cammie, he'd kill her because she was a part of me.

"When is this meeting…what are they selling?" I ask and my breath falters. I can hardly breathe.

"When the meeting is, we don't know…What they're selling…Zach…" he breathes a heavy sigh and my breathing picks up.

Oh, God…

"You have to understand that he's had her for seven years…he's probably no longer…satisfied," my anger rises again at his words but the fear is more dominant…

No, I'm wrong…it can't be…he wouldn't…

"He's planning to auction her, Zach. And this man says he _loves _her. There's no telling what someone who _doesn't _would do to her."

_Pain._

_Pain._

_Pain._

And now I'm sobbing again. I'm crying audibly now because I can't hold it in any longer. Because I was given hope for the first time in almost seven years and now everyone I love is in danger. Everyone I need…

"We're sending security over to you and your daughter right now, Zach. Our surveillance teams will be monitoring everyone in your area to watch for him, because remember that wherever he is, you wife is very likely to be there as well."

And I agreed so then I could hang up and grieve alone and in silence. I was sure I had waken MC up. But then the agent replies with something like a 'Good Luck!' and I swear to God, if he wasn't my last hope, I'd kill him.

~X~X~X~

I remember the first time we made love…yes, it was before marriage. We were seventeen, and were camping out in the woods beyond the lake. We were talking about our futures, when we realized that we both included each other in our futures. Whether it was to get an apartment once we graduate high school, both of us applying to one school: Boston University, or planning trips to where we wanted to go most in the world, places we both wanted to see.

It was then that we both realized that there would be no other. Well, I knew that before, but any doubt I had before dissipated.

And then we were joined. We had many firsts together and being able to share our very last first together, the first of many, was a miracle. A blessing. And way beyond the most incredible experience I've ever had.

And it was all because of her. My love, my life, my soul mate. All her.

She said I was pretty hunky, too.

And to think that another man was taking advantage of her like that…a druggy, of all things! It killed me. I was the only one that could worship her everything. Only I could love her the way I do…

I was shaken out of my thoughts when I noticed MC was no longer sleeping on the couch.

"MC? Baby?" I call out to her. Damn, why can't anyone stay still for five freaking seconds.

I checked in her room, the whole house. No MC.

And a strange sense of de javu crept up into my mind and I was suddenly running outside. I could see her little footprints in the snow and let out a frustrated growl that turned into fear.

There was a murderer roaming about. Looking to kill me…and if he saw MC….Oh, God…

"Grant! Grant!" I pounded on my neighbors door until he stumbled outside.

"What, man, Bex is having cravings and-"

"MC's gone! Luther is out to kill me and she's gone!" I yell and my voice cracks but I don't give a damn.

"Call that Agent guy and I'll come out and help you look!" he says and grabs a coat off of a hanger.

"Grab Betty on your way out!" I remind him and his eyes widen in shock.

"Betty? Ya sure?" he asks and his eyes darken in rage that wasn't directed towards me.

"Yeah, Betty." I say and run back over to my house. I'm dialing Agent Solomon as I reach into the back of the closet and open up a small black case.

"Hello?"

"MC is missing…and I have a feeling Luther is close by."

I say to him and load up my gun, the safety clicking off.

"And if I see him, I'm killing the bastard that kidnapped my wife."

**A.N. So, I was kinda surprised when I got all those reviews! So thank you! You deserved this chapter but now I left y'all on an even bigger cliff hanger, I think. **

**Same system as the last chapter applies! I will update sooner with more reviews!**

**~Akira**


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter Thirteen**

**~Anonymous~**

**~Time Unknown~**

"Why the hell would we want _her? _She looks to skinny and…overused, if you know what I mean!" the room full of men erupted into laughter, besides the man standing in the middle. The one that held authority in his voice. The one with the scar on his upper lip. The one with the only two females in the room.

The old dusty room with plastic covers over the furniture.

"You should realize before you speak so foolishly, Rafael, that this woman is my wife," he sneers and the men exchange glances at each other.

"And the other girl?" a man who has been relatively quiet throughout the meeting chose to speak up.

The man scowls in exchange of his inquiry and seethes with anger, "My wife's daughter."

Silence is met.

Until the soft-spoken man speaks again, "You are selling your own wife and daughter? May I ask why?...Boss?"

He sneers at the infidelity that is his wife, who is barely breathing on the floor, kicking her side once to hear her wheeze. Just to make sure she isn't dying.

"The daughter is not mine." There are gasps throughout the room as he continues; "She is tainted already, so I suppose I will give her to any one of you…"

"How much is she going for-"

"For an exchange! A challenge, if you will," the man gazes at his men individually before continuing, "The first one that brings me my prize, _alive_ and _only alive, _will obtain my wife to do whatever it is you please."

"And for the little female?" asks a man with a growing stubble and a Stetson perched upon his shaved head.

"Use her to lure my prize to you…Than quickly dispose of that…_MISTAKE!" _

Quiet sobs are heard from the little girl with a whispered, "Mommy…"

"What about the prize, boss. What is it we are supposed to acquire…_alive?_" asks the quiet man in the corner.

The scar above his upper lip broadens as he grins, slapping down a small sheet of paper onto a coffee table in the middle of the living room.

But it is not a piece of paper.

It is a picture.

"His name is Zachary Colton Goode."

* * *

><p><strong>A.N.<strong>

**I swear! This is the last really small chapter. Actually I always meant for this chapter to be really small, just to get this side of the story out there before all of the action starts! **

**So now you know what's comin' up for the upcoming chapters!**

**I'm gonna be mean and ask for 30 reviews before I update the next chapter. **

**The next chapter is already written, just so you know!**

**THANKS FOR ALL OF YOUR SUPPORT! **

**~Akira**

**P.S. there's about 5 or 6 chapters left!**


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter Fourteen**

**~Zach Goode~**

**~November 21~**

I never realized until recently how valuable time is. There are so many things I took for granted almost seven years ago that I wish I could get back. I didn't realize that those precious moments with my wife would come to and end so abruptly.

Is that what this is?

The end?

But then there are instances where time seems to creep by slowly. So slow, in fact, that my sanity is on the line. It feels like it's taking its leisurely time to crawl up my spine and run through my veins, completely encompassing me in the ever-present longing. Longing for an alternate universe where Cammie is still here in my arms, her belly round with our child, our daughter playing in the snow and our son tucked in-between us. We both had stable jobs that we worked so hard to gain.

Our family, my father and mother, would still be alive. Rachel Morgan wouldn't resent my guts. My Cammie would have met her nephew, Matt, and our daughter's very best friend that reminds me so much of you and me. You would console Bex while she was pregnant and I would be joyful enough to sit on the porch with Grant and a couple of Corona beers.

And then when someone from our circle of friends has another baby, the men would all go out to smoke cigars and you would become royally pissed at us saying, "We bring life into this world and now you're trying to take away yours? Dumbasses…"

And then we would go home and I would make up for it with our sexy-time.

And then like the goofy, quirky, silly girl you are, you would stay up till three in the morning baking. Just baking. And stuffing your face, of course.

_My silly Cookie._

I used to have dreams of you in our kitchen baking your favorite macadamia chocolate chip cookies, filling our largest china plate with them. Then you would fill a glass of milk and walk your masterpiece up to the nursery which is now MC's princess room. You would place the refreshments on her bedside table and she would hand you a book about knights, castles, dragons, and a princess named MC.

You would read to her in the same hypnotic voice that always lured me to you. The same voice that I fell in love with.

_My sweet Cookie._

You both fall asleep in each other's arms and my chest would contract with so much joy. So much love for my two favorite girls. But I wouldn't dare try to wake you up and get you into a bed that wasn't half your size, mostly just so I could cuddle up with you, but I would leave you two together because I know that one day these precious moments won't be able to be reciprocated. Because time passes to quickly in the human eyes. Because it creeps up slowly but then you find yourself looking behind to find out it has already passed you by.

It felt like time crept by too slowly as Grant and I ran down the streets of the neighborhood looking for any sign of MC.

But all of a sudden it flashed right before my eyes when I neared the abandoned house and I could see MC sitting in the snow.

And it was time that passed right ahead of me before I could register the bound hands of my little girl, or the way her eyes lit up in fear the way they did when she heard the monsters in her closet.

Time flashed right by me.

This time, I saw the van.

~X~X~X~X~

Everything was fuzzy, unclear. I couldn't recall anything that occurred after I spotted MC lying there looking so helpless in the snow. I didn't know where I was. I didn't know where MC or Grant were. But I could definitely feel the ropes digging into my ankles and wrists, since I was currently tied to a cold, plastic chair. I could feel the bulge of the gun in my back pocket.

And.

There.

She.

Was.

_Pain. Pain. Pain._

"C-Cammie…" I struggle with my voice as tears and rapid sobs break through the barrier I've held up for the past seven years.

She looked so much thinner. She looked bruised and broken. Her hair was a bit damp with grime and sweat. Her wrists and ankles were bruised and bloody.

But she was the most beautiful thing I've ever seen.

Still so beautiful.

Anger settles in me, though, since the tears are flowing to rapidly to see anything but a blurred outline. I so desperately want to reach out…

"Cookie? Can you hear me, Love?" I cry out in desperation.

When she doesn't move and I can't see her chest rise and fall through the thick layers of baggy clothes, I start to panic.

"Cammie…" I realize that she's just lying on the floor in front of me…and I recognize the room. The basement of the abandoned house. And just like that, more pain ebbs into me just at the thought of her being so close. So close, all this time.

"Cammie! Answer me! Please…" she lies unmoving. "_Please…"_

I beg, and her head lifts a bit and her beautiful eyes peer up at me. They're glassed over and unfocused, but they are still so, _so _beautiful.

I see her lips form my name but her angelic voice can't be heard. And I am suddenly aching for that sound.

"Cookie," I whimper and she's crying just like I am. And we so desperately want to reach out to each other but I can tell how hard it is for her.

"I love you, Cammie. I love you. I love you…" I trail off as I'm struggling against he tight ropes and I see her trying to say the same to me.

Booming laughter interrupts our chants and heavy footsteps echo throughout the basement.

"What a touching reunion," says a voice behind me that makes me visibly bristle in hostility.

My chair is lurched forward as he kicks me to the floor.

"Cammie, baby, don't you want to see how you've ruined the life of your little indiscretion?" he laughs and pulls Cammie up painfully by the arms, slamming her into the metal pillar in the basement.

"Stop! I'm so sorry, Cammie," I cry because she whimpers in obvious pain and our tears flow freely.

"Oh, Zach….how long has it been? Sixteen years?" he pulls my chair up so that he's right in my face.

It's the first time I've seen Luther Finnegan in sixteen years and to say it's shocking and utterly disgusting is an understatement. His greasy black hair is gelled back and his long nose and beady eyes mirror those of a ferret.

Ferret face.

He licks his lips for a moment before rifling through a bag on the cement floor. He pulls out a long electric prod and grins evilly as he saunters towards me.

"You've corrupted my wife," he sneers and a growl emanates from me.

"She's not _your _FUCKING WIFE!" I yell and he lashes out at me, the electric prod contacting against the exposed skin on my arms after being stripped to just my undershirt and jeans-probably while I was unconscious.

"She IS mine. She's been mine since the first grade! Or do you remember old Zachy-O of how you stole my best friend!" he sneers and jabs the prod into my abdomen and I yell in shock, my eyes rolling into the back of my head.

"And then you turned her against me! You stole her from me for sixteen years!" he beats me with the prod, electrocuting and making the blood rush to my head with each blow continuously.

"And then you knocked her up!" he grunts as he punches me , his fist connecting me with my jaw. My head snaps at the blow and I spit up blood before hanging my head to look towards Cammie who's eyes are even more alert and her lips are moving as if she's trying to scream.

"She is MY WIFE-"

The electric prod connects with my ribcage and I hear a definite cracking sound. I gasp for breath.

"STOP!"

We both still as we hear her hoarse voice reverberate throughout the basement.

"I'm so sorry, Cammie."

"I love you, Zach,"

We both say and we're sobbing together as we stare at each other for the first time in almost seven years.

I finally notice Luther, his eyes dark and his hands red. He's shaking visibly as he stares at us.

Time finally catches up and passes by as he reaches into his back pocket and raises the weapon to my forehead.

I gulp and look at Cammie one last time. One last precious moment.

"I love you, Cookie."

And a shot rings out, disrupting the eerie silence.

**A.N. CLIFFED AGAIN! MWAHAHA! I'm sorry for doin this….okay not really because I'm so evil. Uh huh.**

**So….over 30 reviews on that really mini chapter? WTH? That shocked me completely. See, I was trying reverse psychology to try and get at least 20+ reviews by asking for 30+ reviews…buuut you guys gave me more…SO! **

**I hope you'll comment again!**

**~Akira**


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter Fifteen**

**~Zachary Goode~**

I could still see her.

All I could see was her.

I so desperately needed to reach out to her, but it was like she kept getting lost in the crowd. Just like that night on Halloween. And no matter how many times I called her name, she still wouldn't answer because the blizzard blocked out our voices. Disheveled our sight so that no matter how many steps I took, she would be lost to me.

She would be missing, yet still there.

Missing, but never gone.

Except this time it was she who was calling out to me. It was me who couldn't answer back because this time it was my pain.

So much pain.

"I can't kill you yet, now can I?" Luther sneered but I could barely hear him.

I could only hear the blood rushing through my ears. I so desperately wanted to grab my arm, maybe put off some of the pain to stop the flow of blood that was pooling on the cement floor of the cold basement.

"Stop it! For Gods sakes STOP!" Cammie begged Luther from where she lied sideways on the floor, immobile.

Luther bellowed out a laugh at the sight of her writhing helplessly on the ground and crying out for her secret lover.

"Oh, my wife, see how you've ruined the life of this man? If you weren't going around _behind my BACK…_then maybe he would still live…" Luther chuckled darkly. "Well, now he's going to pay for touching you…for knocking you up when YOU BELONG TO ME!"

The wind was knocked out of my stomach as his fist collided with my ribs.

I gasped for breath, but I had to say it. Even though he wouldn't listen, I still had to say it.

"She…d-doesn't b-belong to y-you," I gasped out once more and winced at the throbbing pain in my arm and sides. "She was never yours, Luther…never…and…our daughter…was not a mistake…both of them…are my life…and you're gonna die…you sonofbitch!"

Luther held his sides as he laughed again, but the tension was palpable as he ran his hand along the electric prod.

Then he swung with so much force.

_Crack._

"CAMMIE!" I cry out as her eyes drew back inside her head and she seized at the force of the electric shock, her body already so weak…

"IF SHE ISN'T MINE, THEN SHE BELONGS TO NO ONE! NO ONE! Not even the popular Zach Goode. Not Luther Finnigan…THE FREAK!"

"CAMMIE! Open your eyes, baby, _please_," I couldn't concentrate on anyone but her. Only her, "_Please, _Cammie…"

"She was the only one who would talk to me…the only one that smiled my way," Luther dropped to the floor, his electric prod and gun scattering beside him. There was an eerie silence as I realized that Cammie had gone unconscious…

Luther's beady eyes snapped open and zeroed in on Cammie. "Nobody can have her."

He stood up and picked up his gun, laughing at the sight of Cammie sprawled on the ground. He aimed and clicked off the safety.

"NO! No, no no no no no! STOP!" I pulled on my restraints, fighting the pain, "Don't hurt her! Please, _please…"_

"Now you want to be my friend, huh, Old Zach?" He glanced at me, his eyes hungry and dark, "No one can have her."

And just as he aimed again, footsteps pounded down the stairs and into the basement. Everything spun as bright flashing lights swirled into the dark doom and sirens blared, stopping Luther in his tracks.

"FREEZE!" a man in an FBI uniform held up his AK47. "Luther Finnigan, you are under arrest for the kidnap, rape, and assault of Agent Cameron Morgan, dealings of illegal substances, multiple cases of murder of the first and second degrees, violations of your parole, violation of restraining orders against you, government trespassing, carrying of illegal weapons, vandalizing government property, and arson. You are to remain silent, everything you say can be used against you in a court of honor. Drop all of your weapons and step aside from Cameron Morgan."

Luther chuckled as he turned to face the crowd of FBI agents.

"Is that all you bastards could dig up on me? I was sure there were plenty more charges…" he laughs, still gripping his gun.

"DROP YOUR WEAPON!" the FBI agent yells once more.

Luther looks me in the eyes, "You'll remember this day, Zach. I'll be missing, sure, but I'll never be gone. You will always remember this. Even when I'm missing, I will haunt you. I will burden you."

"DROP YOUR WEAPONS!"

"And it'll burden her too. And you'll never forget me. Never," he sneers.

I seethe, hatred and pain blurring my eyes and I don't even realize I'm crying and my cheeks are wet.

"DROP YOUR WEAPONS! NOW!"

Luther grins at me one last time, "Like Hell I will," he points the gun to his head.

_BAM!_

And I felt his limp body fall on me, his blood spilling out of his head and dripping all over me and I couldn't get away.

I was suffocating.

And the last thing I could see was my Cammie, my Cookie.

And then she was missing from my sight. But she wasn't gone because I could sense her, like how I could always feel my pull to her even after seven years.

And that's when I knew that she was finally safe.


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter Sixteen**

**~Zachary Goode~**

My eyes felt heavy as I blinked away sleep. I didn't have to see to know where I was. The smell of chemicals and sterile cleaners filled my senses and made me dizzy.

I hate hospitals.

There was sharp pain all over my body, as if someone were pushing pins into me devastatingly slow as I fought to lift my limbs. It felt like hours before I was able to completely open my hazy eyes and I suddenly had the urge to find the nearest cigarette.

Damn, I needed a smoke.

But then my head turned slightly-ever so slightly-and I saw _her. _My wife. My best friend…

And she looked so achingly beautiful. She was skinnier-much skinnier-her hair looked dull instead of it's fuller, healthier look I last saw her with. There were dark circles under her closed eyes and I could see the hints of purple bruises under her hospital gown.

Yet she was still so beautiful and I felt that familiar itch to be closer to her, to touch her and to just…feel that she was here with me. And I prayed to God that this wasn't a dream and that I wouldn't wake up to live the nightmare that's been my reality for the past seven years.

"Cammie," I call out but she doesn't move. She looks so tired and worn and my whole body sinks at the thought that she isn't real. She could be dead like everyone has been saying since a year after she disappeared.

The sound of the door opening slowly brought me out of my haze to see a small nurse walk in with a clipboard in her small hands.

"Mr. Goode, how do you feel?" she asks looking at me over her glasses.

How do I feel?

In pain? Yes, physically, but also a certain numbness.

"Sore," I grimace and she nods, writing something on her chart.

"Well, hun, do you need another morphine cycle? If you don't need it then I suggest we don't use it, since you've been on a continuous cycle for three days-"

"Three days?" I interrupt and she nods slowly, "What happened? How's my wife…Luther, he-my _daughter! _Christ! Where is she?" I breathe heavily as I move to pull all of the monitors from my skin with haste.

"Calm…calm down Mr. Goode, and let me explain…" the nurse says, pushing me back down onto the hospital bed, and for a moment she reminds me of Mrs. Cope.

"Your left leg sustained a shot gun wound, plus some other nasty scrapes we had to stitch up. Your neighbor and daughter were found in the back of a van five miles out. There were a few men lying shot to death in the back with them. Your neighbor revealed in his statement that Luther gunned them down when they demanded their payment in exchange for you. I'm not really allowed to know more than what the rest of the public know so I can't tell you what else is being done about the case, but I can say that your daughter is unharmed. She and your mother-in-law are in the cafeteria getting food. They never leave your side otherwise," the nurse gives a tentative smile.

"What about my wife?" I ask, my shoulders becoming heavier as I weight anxiously.

She sighs loudly, closing her eyes to compose herself.

"She's malnourished for starters…nutrients are low, calcium, iron, fibers, carbohydrates, fats, proteins, you name it, she's low on it. Dehydrated, infections in some open wounds on her body and her uterus. She's anorexic, her body mass itself is too low, and her muscle mass is completely…gone. I suspect that she barely moved at all the past seven years of her life," the nurse cuts a look to my wife and I can clearly see the compassion and sadness behind her glasses.

"When she opens her eyes, we have to dull the lights, since we aren't aware if she was ever exposed to sunlight. She'll have to get physical therapy to strengthen her muscles again, and we'll have to tube feed her to regain her appetite back…"

I feel myself crumbling with every word she speaks. And I'm afraid to ask. I'm to scared I won't get the answer I want.

"And that's just the physical aspect of her recovery…" the nurse says full of remorse, "She'll be requested a therapist as well after the police are done with her statements…"

"Will she survive…?" I feel silent tears running down my face but I couldn't give a damn, "Do you think she has a chance?"

The nurse pats me wearily and replies, "It will take time, Mr. Goode, you just have to be patient and encouraging. With what I've heard about your courage and faithfulness to rescue your wife while putting yourself in danger, I believe she'll make it."

Some of the weight lifts up from my shoulders and I breathe a little bit easier. I look over longingly at my wife and I feel my heart thumping wildly in my chest, "Please, I need to be closer to her. _Please, _I need to…" I squeeze my eyes shut when I remember a whole different addiction I had to that charged feeling I always got when I touched her skin. It made me feel alive.

And all of a sudden I'm being lifted gently to sit upright and I notice that the nurse had brought over a wheelchair, helping me into it.

She doesn't say anything as she rolls me carefully to Cammie's bed.

I want to cry and smile at the same time when I'm mere inches away from Cammie, my Cookie. She's still snoring softly in her deep sleep and I hesitate to bring her hand to mine and finally end up fisting the bed sheets in my fist.

"I'll leave you alone now Mr. Goode," the nurse says softly and I look up at her sad expression.

"What's your name?" I ask since I never even bothered to look at her nametag.

"Nurse Buckingham, I'm head nurse in this department, so call for me if you need anything."

I smile softly at her and reply, "Please, call me Zach…and thank you…" I stutter over my words, "For everything."

XXXX

Twenty minutes passed by where I was just sitting there next to her, thinking, wanting to feel her touch. No one came though the hospital door of the ICU room we were placed in three days ago after Luther Finnigan shot himself. And I would sit there with my fists clenched on the bed, so close to coming in contact with her arm. The steady beeping of the monitors above her head were driving me crazy as it sped up at times until it slowed back to it's normal pace.

I would ball up the hospital blankets in my hand, or lightly skim her pillow near her head with my fingertips. Yet, I was too afraid to touch her. I saw her chest rise and fall with each intake of breath and felt my own synching with hers as it always did. The usual heat that I would feel radiate off her wasn't as strong, and it worried me that it would never be the same.

What if she woke up and didn't remember me? would she remember MC? What if she decided that since I've completely failed her these past seven years, takes off, and never comes back? Would I be able to let her go again? Could I really live or breathe another second without her?

No.

And I shake my head at my crazy thoughts because my Cammie isn't like that.

And I wonder what's going to happen next, and I wonder about how long we're going to be in this hospital and how much therapy we'll all need to get through this. Because we can't get through this alone.

And when doctors come in to give me hers and mine prescriptions, or when Rachel steps in with tears streaming down her face when she spots me, and a sleeping MC over her shoulder as they sit in the chairs in the corners, and when I look away from Cammie briefly to call Bex and ask how Grant is doing, or when the police officers come in and ask some questions before setting up a time to get Cammie's statements, I barely register it.

Because I'm to craven and scared to simply touch her or give my wife comfort when I haven't seen her in seven years and it kills me.

So that's why when it's well passed midnight and my back and leg are surely sore from sitting in this wheelchair all day unmoving, I see her fingers twitch and I immediately grasp her hand in both my palms.

I feel the same warmth and am quickly at ease and wired at the same time. My breath catches and I realize I'm mumbling incoherently as I press my lips to the back of her hand, moving to her palm, then her fingertips.

And for now this is all I need. As long as I have this connection to her, I can finally breathe easier and the weight that I've carried on my shoulders for the past seven years is completely lifted and I can't help but ball her hand into mine and hold it between my eyes as I sob again for what feels like the nth time. But these tears aren't laced with sadness, regret maybe, but no longer sadness as much as elation. Joy courses through m body as I realize that it all feels the same, that we'll make it through this and come out stronger for it. We'll be able to live the rest of our lives one day with our daughter without the burden of Luther.

It's all because of this girl that drives me crazy after the twenty-three years I've known her…

…

"_Hey Zach," I blink open my sleepy eyes when I hear Cammie's voice and feel her tiny feet nudging my legs. _

"_Yeah?" I ask warily because she has that sparkle in her eye and that smirk that I've come to recognize on m best friend's face. _

"_My mom said that you're mom said you're going through the 'nightlight phase'," she looks smug as she swings her legs off the dock._

_I feel heat radiating off of me in waves and know I'm probably blushing scarlet. _

_I'm too embarrassed to reply and look away, leaning on the rails on the dock. _

"_Why are you scared of the dark?" Cammie asks a little later._

_I don't really want to explain to her why I'm still afraid of the dark when I'm nine years old, so I shrug._

_She inches closer to me until her hand is in mine and her head is leaning against my shoulder, "I get scared of the dark too. Especially when I dream about my Daddy."_

_I look at her and I feel sorry. So I say, "I get scared because I feel alone. When I'm in my room by myself and it's dark, I get scared that when the sun comes up again, I'll be alone."_

_I feel my neck and cheeks getting red again when she squeezes my hand._

"_I'm just a few houses down, Zach. I won't disappear when the sun comes up. I'll be there, I promise," she says and smiles, "You should think of cookies."_

_I look at her like a tree just popped out of her ears, "What? Why?" _

"_Cause when I think of something nice and good, I fall asleep. So I think of cookies," she shrugs and it's her turn to blush._

"_I'll try it," I nudge her foot with my toes as we both swing our legs back and forth off the dock._

"_I'll race you to the abandoned house!" she offers suddenly and we're both on our feet._

"…_1…"_

"…_2…"_

"…_3…"_

_I let her win._

_And I dream about cookies and Cammie because those are nice and good things and she promised to be there when the sun rises, so I don't need my nightlight anymore._

…

I spend the rest of the night making sure she's comfortable by adjusting the pillows when she scrunches up her nose every so often or tuck strand of her hair behind her ears.

And I can't stop touching her, keeping as much contact as possible because I can't bare to fathom what would happen if I lost sight of her again.

It wasn't until around three in the morning when I heard faint tiny pitter-patters come towards me, brushing it off as the machines, until I felt a tug on my hospital gown.

"Daddy," a little voice whispered to me and I broke my eyes away from my wife, still clutching her hand as if it were my life line-which it really was-and turned to see my baby rubbing her eyes with both hands and her small lips formed in a soft yawn.

"Oh, my baby, you're awake?" I scoop her up with one arm so she's sitting in my lap and I'm holding her tight to my chest.

"Yeah, Daddy, don't you see my eyes are open?" she raises her eyebrows and I can't help but notice how she gets her cynicism from her mother. They both like to leave me gaping like an idiot.

"Yeah, baby, I see you're beautiful eyes _are _open," I kiss her cheeks and forehead while her little arms wrap around my torso and she lets out another yawn.

"Is that Mommy?" MC asks, "Gran says it is Mommy but I wasn't sure. Is she my Mommy, Daddy?"

My heart stutters a moment before I compose myself. _After this, all the hesitation will be over._ I tell myself and nod.

"This is your Mommy, MC. This is Mommy," I say quietly and absently rub my thumb back and forth on her palm.

MC looks at her with wide eyes, "I remember…C-Can I hold her hand too," she asks and I nod, full of emotion.

"Of course, baby," I say and she unravels her arms from around me and puts one of her small hands in Cammie's palm, and I squeeze both and hold on tight.

_This, is my lifeline._

And that's when I realized that we would be a family again. No matter how long it takes. We'll be okay.

XXXX

**A.N. So…anyone excited for when Cammie wakes up and we get that big reunion we've all been waiting for? The final chapter is next and then the epilogue! **

**Review, dahlings, so I can update faster than this! I almost waited a MONTH! Man, I feel tons of awful. But thanks for the wait!**

**~Akira**

**P.S. For those Broken Swans fans out there, I will be updating this week! So look for it!**


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter Seventeen**

**~Cammie Morgan~**

I hesitantly open my eyes, getting ready for _his _voice. He would tell me to get up, wait for him to carry me into the back of the van and smell the fumes of his cigarettes and pot. Sometimes I would feel the injections of whatever drugs he forced into me to make me numb and even drowsier.

But that wasn't what my eyes met. They met those wonderful emerald green eyes that I've dreamed about every day since I was taken away that day in Minnesota.

And his scent.

Pine needles, peppermint, and something that was just Zach; husky and masculine.

And I needed him. All of him.

I needed to hear his voice or else I would go crazy, not knowing if this was a bittersweet dream or blissfully real.

"Zach…" I whimper and ache to feel him.

"Baby," I hear his voice and feel the tears on my cheeks. Those goddamn tears.

And then his hand is in mine and everything feels better. My body doesn't feel numb with pain and Luther no longer exists.

His free hand is smooth down my hair, lightly touching my cheeks and tracing down my noes and sweeping under my eyes.

"How you feeling baby?" he asks, running his fingers through my messy hair…that smells like coconut?

Since he can still read my mind like he could since we were seven, he says, "Your mom washed your hair after your surgeries…MC wanted you to use her favorite coconut shampoo."

I smile so big for the first time in years that it actually hurts.

"My baby…where is she?" I ask and grimace at the sound of my voice. So hoarse and weak.

"Shh…" he calms me, the feeling of his hands in my hair so soothing, "She's here, baby, she stayed up as long as possible but after three nights of hardly any sleep she knocked out on my bed," he chuckles softly and smooths over my furrowed eyebrows.

"I missed you both so much," I sob, "I'm so sorry-"

"You have absolutely _nothing _to be sorry for, Cammie. We'll get through this, you and me, okay? But we'll take it slow. We don't have to talk about it today, okay? Let's just get you better first," he says and I nod in agreement.

"I love you," I say and feel his fingertips brush along my bottom lip.

"I love you too," he says pressing his lips lightly to my cheeks, then my forehead, then my eyelids, my nose.

And then his lips were on mine and it was like our first kiss again, except it wasn't as sloppy as it was back then. It was soft and sweet because we were taking it slow. Yet, it was passionate as our tongues brushed together, our breathing coming in rapid heaps. I never wanted it to end, if we could stay in this moment and forget how broken we both were.

But it was enough for now.

I don't remember who pulled away first, just that soon he was next to me and I was in his arms and him in mine, both holding on as close as possible. The room was filled with 'I love you's and promises of getting through this along with tears from both of us.

And of course, promises of becoming a family again.

~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~

Zach had wheeled himself over to the bed beside mine, where I could make out my child I last saw when she was 21 inches, now bundled under the sheets, barely making out blond hair popping out at the top.

"MC? Wake up baby…your momma's awake," Zach whispers in her ear, gently shaking her tiny frame.

I hear a tiny yawn and I yearn for my baby girl to be in my arms. I've missed so much of her life, first birthday, Christmases, first words, first haircuts, first everything…I can't bare it to miss anymore of her life.

In the end, my baby saved my life.

"What Daddy?" she says and I giggle at her exasperated tone. She reminds me of myself at that age.

"Momma is awake now. She wants to see you," he says with a crooked grin playing on his lips.

"Momma is awake?" she pops right out of the bed and runs over to me with her crazy bed hair flopping all over the place.

I laugh through my joyous tears and reach out with both arms.

"Momma!" she cries out with the biggest smile and jumps into my arms and right by .

my side on the hospital bed. I crush my baby girl to me and can't help the tears that overwhelm me.

"I love you Macey," I kiss my little girl all over her face and I can see some of her own tears too.

"I love you momma," she wraps her arms around my neck and curls her tiny legs around my torso and I don't care that it kind of hurts. She's finally in my arms. I don't know how I could have ever left her seven years ago.

"You're such a big girl now, MC. So beautiful," I say and stroke her long beautiful hair.

"Daddy says tha' too! He say I'm beautiful like you," she says and kisses my cheek, a nice sloppy one that warms my heart.

"Even more beautiful than me, Princess," I wipe my eyes and peek over at my husband who's crying too, but I see that huge smile that mirrors my own.

"You here to stay, Momma? Can you stay forevers?" MC asks with both of her tiny hands on my cheeks.

"Yeah, baby, I'm here forever," I say and she smiles again.

Zach wheels himself over and grabs my hand, kissing my palm and holding it to his cheek and I know right at that moment, that nothing could take me away from the two loves of my life ever again.

We would some how get through this together and those seven years wouldn't compare to the many more years to come.

~X~X~X~X~X~X~

**Merry Christmas! It's a short chapter but since I'm updating all of my stories, I think that makes up for it? I hope you guys have a nice Holiday! PM me if you have questions and leave a review (kind of like your present to me :] ).**

**Epilogue next!**

**~Akira**


	18. Epilogue

**Epilogue**

**~Zachary Goode~**

_I was one of the lucky few that got to meet their soul mate at the age of seven. As cheesy as that sounds, it's undeniable. I don't know if I ever believed in fate or destiny, but I know that my wife was meant to be mine. _

_I've learned to deal with the fact that it could've been fate or destiny that took her away from me for seven years. Whether it was any of those reasons or just the fact that her crazy stalker from high school was psychotic didn't matter. Yes, we lost so much time and so many potential memories, especially with our daughter, but we moved on as best we could._

_It wasn't easy. It took months to get healthy, physically and mentally, for the three of us. There were meltdowns and emotional reunions and large medical bills to pay but it was so worth it. She was so worth it._

_And she was so beautiful. My angel. My Cookie. There was a lot of that too, cookies. _

_When she found out I quit my job at the firm, she was pissed. She cried and punched my chest with her fists she was so mad. She would say that even if she never came back, she wanted me to keep living since she knew it was my dream to be the best District Attorney I could be. _

_So I started my own practice. _

_There was a lot of lovin' to make up for too. It was in the chaste and not so chaste kisses as we passed each other in the hallway from my study or the kitchen. It was in the way I had to embrace her whenever I got the chance and just hold her for hours. _

_But the best moments were when I saw my Munchkin and my Cookie having their mother/daughter moments. It made tears well up in my eyes when I saw them connecting. _

_MC loved her mom the moment they saw each other since the last time: when MC was a week old. _

_They did so much together. Coloring, watching movies, cooking, playing in the lake, and that's when I felt the most content. Both of my beautiful girls were safe, and in my arms. _

_But now there was another addition._

"Hey Daddy," Elliot said running up to in nothing but his tighty whities. He is so my son.

He jerked his body away when I try to reach for him and giggles, running behind me to make a break for it.

"Whoa, Buddy, watcha doing?" I laugh and grab his little arms to lift him off the ground. His squeals of laughter fill the room and he wriggles around.

"Dah'y I'm nakey!" he squeals and laughs.

MC comes storming into the room with her hair disheveled and a pair of shorts and a Spiderman T-Shirt in her hands.

"Elliot! I told you not to run away! I'm trying to dress you!"

"Here, let me," I grin and take the clothes from her.

Elliot wiggles and squirms but I eventually get his clothes on and look up at my daughter, "Thanks for the help, Mace," I ruffle her hair up even more.

"I'm only twelve! I don't like kids!" she throws her hands up and huffs.

"So then there's no reason to date boys or ever get married," I grin brightly at this revelation and kiss her on the cheek.

"Daddy," she rolls her eyes and grabs the sunblock from the kitchen table, "Speaking of boys, I'm gonna go meet Jason at the lake. See ya!"

I scowl because I'm suspicious of that boy. Very suspicious.

Once my four-year-old son is knocked out on the coach taking a nap, Cammie walks in, glowing and carrying shopping bags no less.

"Had a good girl's day?" I ask and wrap my arms around her. It's been five years since I found her again. I wasn't ever letting her go.

"I did…but I missed you," she says and kisses my lips.

And that's when I know that we won't be separated. Ever again.

**The End**

**A.N. I want to thank everyone who's read this story and for your amazing reviews! I'm so sorry for you guys having to put up with my late updating but…you know, life and all. **

**I will be asking for suggestions or requests you guys have for any outtakes or futuretakes you guys want from this story! Like…Cammie's POV on the first kiss. MC's futuretake? Elliot's Futuretake. ETC! I really will take any of you requests and try my best to do them all!**

**Now that this is officially complete, look out for my stories in progress: Broken Swans and Letters to my Soldier. **

**Thanks again and see you on the other side!**

**~Akira**


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